#sorry i am not over this like conrad is okay

[hoedameron]

not to talk about dbh fanon in 2023 pero it’s still brazy that so many ppl thought conan was a good name to give to rk800-60 smdh

[probably-writing-x]

Missing Piece.

Summary: can you do conklin!reader x conrad where since she’s the oldest sibling, laurel had so much expectations for her and she held a lot of responsibility to the point where she couldn’t even enjoy being a kid. this is gonna sound sad but let’s say conrad chose belly over her but he was really just confused about what he wants which was reader but since her and belly are so similar, he chose belly and the reader had a big argument that led to her being the bad guy and all the stress caused her to just leave cousins and cut contact with everyone. Flash forward like 2 years ( reader is in college and everyone else is beginning college soon ) reader comes back to cousins and everyone is shocked to see she has a son 😭 it doesn’t have to be conrad’s i was thinking it could be like an ex boyfriends or one night stand’s BUT yeah she comes back with a whole kid and she’s so grown now. ( you can add a lil stepdad conrad if you want 😮‍💨 )

Warnings: Discussions of toxic family relations, mentions of unplanned pregnancy

Author’s Note: I’m sorry this is so long but I took this idea and RAN with it! Hope y’all enjoy plz plz plz let me know what you think

You always knew how your little sister Belly had felt about Conrad when you were all growing up. For as long as you could remember, she’d been head over heels for him. She laughed a little harder at his jokes, remembered a little more about everything he said. She loved him.

You weren’t exactly sure when your feelings for Conrad had started, however. He’d always just been a friend. The boy you spent every summer with as the two of you were responsible for babysitting the rest. He’d always just been Conrad. But lately that had felt like it was changing.

The worst part about it all? You couldn’t even tell him how you felt. For the fear of breaking your little sisters heart was worse than letting your own break right in front of you.

“Are you even listening to me (y/l/n)?” Conrad stretches out a leg to kick you from where he sat on the other end of the couch and you look up from your book to see him.

“Um,” You clear your throat, “No, I didn’t hear a word you said.”

He rolls his eyes at you, “I asked if you were coming to the party tonight.”

“Oh, yeah, I hadn’t thought about it,” You shrug, “Is everyone going?”

He shrugs his shoulders, “I haven’t asked everyone. I’ve asked you.”

You smile in return, “Yeah, sure, I’ll come.”

He stretches forward and grabs the book from your hands, “What are you reading?”

“Con!” You exclaim, reaching over his legs to try to grab the book from his hands, “Give it back.”

He laughs and holds it high over his head, away from your reach as you fall forward, hand catching yourself on his chest.

You look up to his eyes and he’s looking down at you with a smirk on his lips.

“Can you please give me my book back?”

“I could,” He returns, the pages still tight between his grip.

“Okay, will you?”

“What’s in it for me?”

There’s something about the way he says the words. Hoarse in his throat, almost catching on his tongue, foreign tone to hear from his lips. You feel the heat increasing in your cheeks and try to ignore it.

“Nothing, just give it back,” You groan, stretching far up enough that your fingertips brush the pages and he eventually releases the book from his grip.

You compose yourself and return to your side of the couch, trying to ignore the deep heat coursing through your cheeks.

“Hey!” Belly’s voice sounds from the doorway as she comes in, “I’m not interrupting am I?”

“No, no, of course not,” Conrad stands up quickly from the couch, “Are you ready to go?”

Belly nods, “Yeah, sure. Are you coming (y/n)?”

You force a small smile in their direction, “I’ll be there in a bit.”

“(Y/n) I really need your help tonight,” Your Mom, Laurel walks into the room in their absence, “We’ve got so much to set up for tomorrow so I’ll need your help with it all.”

You set your book down and look up at her, “Actually I think there’s a party tonight that everyone’s going to so I sort of had plans.”

She brushes you off, busy looking at something on her phone, “Well just cancel your plans.”

“It’s a party, Mom, everyone’s going,” You roll your eyes, “Can’t I just help tomorrow morning?”

“Can you please not make this more difficult than it needs to be?” She shakes her head at you, “You’re eighteen now, aren’t you too old for those kinds of things?”

“Right, yeah, eighteen is the cut off point for having fun,” You stand up from the couch.

“(Y/n) wait!” She calls after you, “I need you to go to-“

“The store, yeah, I just got the list,” You wave your phone in your hand, “(Y/n) Conklin at your service.”

Your relationship with Laurel has never been ideal. You were the oldest of the three of you and so her expectations for you seemed far beyond what she wanted from the others. She was more patient with them, more understanding. You didn’t get that. They got a childhood and you got the responsibility of looking after them. They went to the fair? You had to make sure they all came back in one piece. They went to a party? You had to be the designated driver and make sure neither of them drank too much. Something important going on? They got to be kids whilst you dealt with it like an adult. You grew up too fast and she was to blame for that - her expectations tainting any form of childhood you could’ve held onto.

You step outside and start walking towards your car, pausing when you hear the sound of laughter from the others. Conrad has Belly in his arms, lifting her up from the ground as the other boys try to grab her legs. He’s holding her tight, a bright smile on his face when he looks at her. They’d had that tradition for years. Since you were first coming to Cousins. But you were never a part of it. Because whilst they grabbed Belly and ran her to the pool, you had to help your Mom carry in the luggage and set up everyone’s rooms. Traditions, right?

“(Y/n)!” Jeremiah yells over to you when he catches sight of you, “Are you coming later? We thought we could go to the store and get some drinks before we go.”

He walks over to you and the other boys follow behind.

“Um,” You drag a hand through your hair, glancing at the house, “I can’t come tonight, I’ve got stuff to help my Mom with here.”

“Oh come on, you’re so boring,” Steven groans, “You never come to parties.”

Right, because I’m too busy picking up the slack for you and Belly.

“Yeah, sorry, Laurel’s orders,” You shrug, “Maybe next time.”

“Can you at least stop at the store and use your fake? Thank youuuuu,” Steven yells back as he heads back towards the pool.

You roll your eyes, forcing a smile to the Fisher brothers, “I’ll see you guys later.”

Conrad frowns a little at you, “You sure you’re not coming?”

You shrug your shoulders, “I’ll be designated driver, you can just call me when you need picking up.”

He smiles faintly and watches as you head towards your car, your shoulders dropping as you let out a sigh. Laurel’s orders.

———

You spend the night helping your Mom and Susannah set up for their charity event before you eventually get a text from Steven asking you to come get them.

You drive across the town to the other end and pull up in front of the house, texting them to say you’re outside.

Only Jeremiah and Steven step out though.

“Thanks for coming,” Jere smiles, sitting in the back seat, “You’re a lifesaver.”

You frown at the two of them, “Where’s the rest?”

Steven laughs, “Don’t get us started.”

“What’s going on?” You ask, glancing back in the mirror to catch Jeremiah’s face, watching as his jaw clenches.

“Conrad and Belly disappeared together,” Steven explains, “They were all over each other, and then the next minute we couldn’t find either of them.”

“So-“ You clear your throat, words seemingly catching on your tongue, “So you don’t know where they are?”

“They’re together, they’re fine,” Steven shrugs, “But god I’m dreading hearing that story tomorrow.”

You swallow the lump in your throat and lock eyes with Jeremiah who just shrugs his shoulders at you. He was your counterpart in this. Him in love with Belly despite his brother. You in love with Conrad despite your sister.

“Can we go?” Steven nudges you, “I’m starving.”

The three of you drive back in relative silence apart from Steven hiccuping every five seconds, until you reach the house and you pull up on the driveway. You make sure to shut the door quietly behind you so that Laurel wouldn’t complain in the morning and the two boys disappear into the kitchen.

“(Y/n) can I eat some of your-“ Steven calls out loudly.

You stick your head around the doorframe of the kitchen and shush him, whispering back, “Eat whatever you want as long as it’s not the food for tomorrow.”

He salutes in your direction and you roll your eyes, walking through into the lounge and collapsing down onto one of the couches. Your Mom would kill you if Belly didn’t come home tonight, and especially if you didn’t have any clue where she was.

So whilst the boys eat and reside to their bedrooms, you wait.

-

It’s around three am when you hear the door open again and two hushed voices coming through into the silent house.

“Is everyone asleep?” You hear Belly whisper and you glance up from the couch.

That’s when you see it. His hand intertwined with hers, his flannel shirt around her shoulders, both of their eyes alight.

“I think so,” Conrad hisses in return as the two of them walk towards the stairs.

She steps up ahead of him but he pauses on the bottom step, glancing into the lounge where his eyes lock with yours. You don’t look away and neither does he, so you watch as he swallows the lump in his throat, his hand dropping from its grip on Belly’s.

You look away then, turning over on the couch so that your back faces them. It’s such a quick response isn’t it? Five seconds and now your throat feels like it can’t breathe air, and your eyes are pricked with tears threatening to spill. You let out a shaky breath and grip firmly onto the cushion beneath your head, your chest feeling tighter and tighter.

———

The following morning you wake up to the sound of voices in the kitchen and you groan at the sudden realisation of how uncomfortable the couch really is.

When you walk through, it’s your brother and sister.

“She’s alive!” Steven laughs, “What happened to you last night?”

You drag a hand over your face, “I-“ Your eyes shift to Belly who’s stood with the faintest smile over her face as she sips her coffee, the look of a girl in love, “I was going to stay awake to make sure Belly got back safe but I must’ve… I don’t know, I must’ve fallen asleep before she got back.”

“Oh, yeah, sorry, we were pretty late,” She clears her throat, “I mean, I was- we weren’t-“

“Come on Bels everyone saw you and Conrad together,” Steven scoffs, “You didn’t exactly make it discrete.”

“Well, I-“ Belly laughs a little, “We just-“

“I don’t think I want to hear this,” Steven groans, “Please spare me the details.”

He takes a cup of coffee from the counter and walks out, his shoulders hanging low.

You take a deep breath and turn back to your sister, pausing for a second. Something about her seems so different - like she’s a whole new person. One piece of her life fallen into place and she was… happy. You swallow the lump in your throat.

“So, you and Conrad,” You mention, your back turned to her as you pull out a pancake mix from the cupboard.

“I don’t even know how it happened,” She shakes her head, “I mean, you all know I’ve had a crush on him since I could remember and then he told me he wanted us to be together and I-“

“He wants you to be together?” You half-choke out the words, your hands feeling weak, your heart numb.

“That’s what he said,” She nods, “We still need to talk about things but yesterday seemed pretty official.”

You blink a couple of times and take a deep breath, pulling your shoulders back a little, “That’s great, Bels, I’m happy for you.”

Before you can say anything more, Conrad walks through into the kitchen, pausing when he sees the two of you.

“Oh, um, morning,” He offers a small smile, letting out a breath.

You nod in greeting, “I’m going to leave you two to it.”

“(Y/n)…” Conrad speaks quietly as you go to leave, his hand reaching out towards you.

You look up at him and there’s a shift in his eyes, a difference in the way he looks at you. Like he knows everything and nothing about what he’s done.

“Never mind,” He shakes his head.

And you’re gone.

———

You don’t see them for the rest of the day. In fact, you don’t see anyone. You go down to the beach at some point in the afternoon and swim in the flat waves and return to the house hours later with damp hair. Your Mom makes a comment about how you need to look presentable for this evening.

You’ve showered and are sat on your bed wrapped in a baggy hoodie and shorts straightening your hair when there’s a knock on your door.

“(Y/n) can I come in?”

It’s Jeremiah.

“Yeah, of course,” You shift on your seat and he steps inside.

“I just wanted to see how you were,” He perches himself on the edge of the bed, looking at you through the mirror.

“I’m okay, this event should be good,” You lie through a smile, fixing the hair around your face.

“(Y/n)…” He frowns at you, “You don’t have to lie.”

“Wh-“

“He broke your heart,” He confirms for you, “And she broke mine.”

You laugh a little, “Well that makes us sound sad, Jere.”

He smiles gently, softly, “It’s okay for you to be upset about it. You don’t have to put on that facade like you normally do.”

“I just-“ You shake your head, “I can’t be upset. I’m happy for Belly, she’s loved him since forever.”

“(Y/n),” Jeremiah waits until you turn around to face him, “You’ve spent your life being happy for Belly, it’s okay for you to let yourself once wish that you were happy for you.”

You look down at the ground and back up, shaking your head a little as tears pool at your eyes, “I just really thought it would be me.”

Instantly, Jere jumps from the bed and hurries over to you, engulfing you in his arms as you bury your head into his chest.

“I did too,” He mumbles as he runs a hand up and down your back.

“God, I’m so stupid,” You laugh, dragging your hands under your eyes, “I need to stop this before tonight.”

He pulls back and holds both of your shoulders, “You’re going to get dressed into your best dress, and you’re going to look beautiful, and we’re going to drink, and drink some more, and we’re both going to forget all about last night. How does that sound?”

You nod your head, “Okay.”

“Okay,” Jeremiah grins, “Now cheer up before you make me cry too.”

You laugh softly, watching him disappear before you let out a shaky breath, turning back to yourself in the mirror and setting your shoulders back to fix your posture.

You could do this.

———

By the time you come downstairs, the house is flooded with people all in attendance for the event. The garden doors are open and people have spilled outside, all mingling between each other as Susannah goes around to greet everyone that she can.

You take a glass of champagne from the tray in the kitchen and tip it back until the liquid empties down your throat, and you grimace a little at the taste.

“Woah, take it easy Conklin,” Steven raises his brows at you as you refill your glass, “You never drink.”

“Yeah, well, it’s a party isn’t it?” You shrug your shoulders, tipping back another glass.

“Who are you and what have you done with my sister?” Steven laughs.

You go to respond but your eyes fall on the pair just across the room. The girl’s fingers fixing the bow tie around the boy’s neck, her hands settling onto his chest soon after, a smile on her face. Belly and Conrad.

“They seem pretty-“

“Yeah, I know,” You respond quickly, “Made for each other.”

“I was going to say full-on,” Steven grimaces, “It’s weird.”

You shrug, “Maybe they’re happy.”

You swallow the lump in your throat and try to ignore the tightening in your chest, sure that you could leave at that sight alone.

How could you do this? How could you be normal with them when it was like this? How could you spend every day with them?

“I can’t be here,” You shake your head, “I need some air.”

You grab a bottle of tequila from the liquor display and take it with you outside, sipping from it before you’ve even got to the garden.

It’s colder as the sun is already setting but another sip of tequila seems to take the edge off just a little, and its already going to your head.

You start making your way around the perimeter of the pool, your steps a little off balance as you teeter across the edge.

“(Y/n)?” Belly’s voice calls from the doorway of the house, “What are you doing out here?”

Your foot spins you to face her and you catch sight of her at the door, a black jacket wrapped around her shoulders. The sight makes your heart sink into your stomach, churning your insides.

“Come on, Mom wants you to mingle wit-“

“I don’t care what Mom wants,” You reply harshly, swigging back the tequila once again.

“Wh- what are you talking about?”

“I’ve done my bit, okay? I’ve done more than my bit. She can leave me alone for one night,” You roll your eyes, “Just one fucking night.”

“What’s going on with you (y/n)? This isn’t like you,” She wraps her arms around herself, the jacket tightening across her shoulders.

“Is that… is that his jacket?”

The rational part of you is unsure as to why you even ask it. But the tequila is almost a third gone now, and you’re not sure the rational is what’s in control anymore.

“We- yeah, he gave it to me to come outside,” Belly confirms, “What’s that got to do with-“

“Did you know I liked him?” You interrupt.

“(Y/n) what-“

“Answer the question,” Your words are harsh, too harsh probably, “When you kissed him last night, when he told you he wanted to be with you, did you know that I liked him?”

“Come on, you know how I’ve felt about Conrad, how I feel about him,” Belly shakes her head, “This isn’t ab-“

“About me? Right, of course it’s not,” You scoff, stepping towards her, “Because god forbid things don’t work out the way Belly wants them to, right? God forbid we’re not all making sure that you’re happy and that things are going your way. God forbid anyone else get a fucking happy ending!”

You know you’re raising your voice, you can tell from the way she flinches as you speak. But that doesn’t seem to matter anymore either.

“You wanted him and so you got him. And me and Jere? We don’t matter, do we? We’re just thrown to the curb so that you can be fucking happy,” You half laugh, “I gave up everything for you, Belly. For you and for Steven, I gave up my whole fucking childhood. I couldn’t be a child because you two needed to be them instead. So I grew up, I stopped going out so I could do chores for Mom, chores that you missed because you were too busy with Taylor or at volleyball or failing your fucking classes. I did it all! I gave up everything. And the one thing it felt like I had was… him.”

You choke out the last word and feel the tears prick at your eyes.

“Conrad was the only one that understood, the only one who knew what it was like to feel responsible for your asses,” You scoff, “And… I gave that up too.”

“You didn’t give him up, (y/n), Conrad chose to be with me!” Belly defends, her voice breaking.

By now, the small crowd in the garden has started to increase to hear what was going on, people slowly starting to trail out of the door until you see the familiar faces.

“Girls, can we try doing this somewhere else?” Susannah steps outside, trying to smile for the guests gathering around.

“(Y/n)!” Laurel hisses, hurrying down to where the two of you stood, “Can you control yourself please? There are guests here!”

You look at her and let out a scoff, “My fault, of course.”

“You should know better,” She mutters to you, faking a polite smile for the people watching.

“Yeah, maybe I should, Mom,” You nod, fighting back your tears, “Excuse me.”

You step away from her and Belly and push your way across the garden, towards the side of the house, past the outdoor shower.

“(Y/n)!” Conrad’s voice approaches from behind you.

You keep walking in your direction, refusing to be interrupted until you feel the grip of his arm around your wrist, turning you around.

“Get off me, Conrad,” You pull away from him but his grip remains.

“Talk to me (Y/n)!” He exclaims, “Talk to me, tell me what’s going on.”

“Tell you what’s going on?” You laugh, “Like you don’t fucking know!”

“l do- What do you want me to say?” He looks frantically between your eyes, dropping his hand from your arm.

“I want you to tell me that it’s Belly you want,” You snap, “I want you to tell me that you feel the same way about her as she feels about you.”

“It’s- I mean… it’s complicated.”

“It fucking shouldn’t be!” You yell back, “You chose her, you should know how you feel about her.”

“Chose her? What… you…”

“Yeah, you fucking chose her!” You push his chest, “I was right fucking here Conrad! I was right here! I’ve always been here,” Your voice cracks and tears spill over your cheeks.

Conrad holds your hands over his chest, like he wants to hold onto a piece of you, “(Y/n) I didn’t know.”

“You didn’t know,” You step back, sniffing, “Of course you didn’t.”

“(Y/n)…” His voice trails off as he sees you, the broken version of you that he seemed to cause.

“It’s always been her, hasn’t it? She was Laurel’s favourite daughter, she was the more popular one at school, she’s Susannah’s favourite, she’s… she’s yours. And I was there to just… drive her home, cook her dinner, let her cry, buy her shit to make her feel better. I was just… there.”

He doesn’t speak, watching the way you seem to shrink into yourself at the words.

“I’m never going to be good enough, am I? For Laurel, for this family… for you?”

“(Y/n) please…”

“I’m sorry, I just… I need to…” You clear your throat, dragging a hand through your hair before you hurry inside.

———

You don’t get much sleep that night, instead running over a thousand options in your head before settling on the only one that makes any sense - that you need to go.

By five, you’ve packed up your things into a bag, checked over everything twice to make sure nothing was left behind, and grabbed your keys to head downstairs. The house is silent, and littered with the fancy aftermath of the party. You glance behind you once more and step outside, fleeing towards your car.

“(Y/n)!” Even the sound of your name rings through a trauma from the night before.

You turn around against the bright morning light to see Conrad jogging towards you.

“What are you doing?” He asks you, a frown on his face.

“I’m…” You clear your throat, “I’m just heading out.”

He looks down at the bag in your hand and his shoulders drop, “You’re leaving.”

You take a deep breath, “I… I have to Con.”

“(Y/n) please,” He reaches forward and takes one of your hands into his, “I need you to know, I- I didn’t mean to hurt you. I never wanted that.”

You pull your hand from his grip and cup the side of his face, your thumb brushing his cheek, “Con, I know you didn’t. But, I can’t stay here like this. I can’t be here. Okay?”

He looks away from you momentarily and back up to your eyes, his seemingly losing their hope.

You brush away the strands of hair around his forehead, “I’ll see you around, Fisher.”

—— 2 Years Later ——

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Carmen asks you, perched on the edge of your bed, “I mean, seriously, how long has it been?”

“Two years,” You confirm, folding up another top to put into your bag, “And I think it’s a terrible idea, but I’ve got to bite the bullet eventually.”

“How do you think they’re going to react?” He persists, “Do you think they’ll be mad?”

“Um,” You take a deep breath, “Maybe. I think it’ll be a shock more than anything. I just, I want them to see me, you know? And, look, Jere never did anything wrong. He’s reached out to be a thousand times and I want to be there for him today - that’s all I care about.”

“And who can be mad at a little face like this?” Carmen looks down at the small bundle wrapped in his crib, peacefully asleep for now.

Your son had been born two months ago. You and Carmen had been dating through your first year of college before you fell pregnant. You’d split up only a few weeks before you found out you were expecting, but the two of you had managed to successfully co-parent so far. He came to all of your appointments, asked far too many questions, slept on the spare room in your dorm when he was worried about you, and had held your hand all through the delivery. Since then, you’d managed to both fit your schedules around taking care of your baby. He worked weekends and you worked evenings, he stayed in your dorm when he knew you needed to sleep and you both avoided a fair bit of socialising so that you could be there for your son. It worked. And, more than anything, you were the happiest you’d been.

“Alright little man, be good for Mommy okay?” Carmen lifts up your son, Kylo, from his bed, “I’ll see you soon.”

He sets the baby into his car seat and fixes the straps around his chest.

“I’ll help you get him in the car,” Carmen encourages, following behind you as the two of you leave the dorm and head down towards the parking lot.

He fixes the car seat into its slot in the car, checking it twice before he steps back.

“Alright, I’ll let you know if it’s a disaster and I’ll be driving back tonight,” You laugh a little, “And if you get an SOS text from me please put your foot down and get there as soon as you can.”

Carmen chuckles, squeezing your arm, “It’s going to be fine, okay? They love you and they miss you.”

You nod, “Let’s hope so.”

“Drive safe,” He steps back, letting you get into the drivers seat.

“Wish me luck,” You smile, waving goodbye as you reverse out of the parking spot.

It had been two years since you’d seen the Fishers, and even your own family. You’d left that day at the beach house and not returned. There were countless calls from your Mom, and Steven, and Susannah and Jere. But nothing from Conrad and Belly. You’d moved your things out of your home shortly after and moved into college as early as you could. It has been good for you.

The first big milestone was when you didn’t go home for thanksgiving. All of the family would be at Cousins and you told your Mom you couldn’t make it. The same again at Christmas. Eventually, a few months after, Laurel had stopped trying. She knew you needed your space, as much as she resented you for it. You’d kept in touch with Steven, and Jeremiah still spoke to you as much as he could. But none of them knew about Kylo. You weren’t ready for that yet. This was your son, you’d done it without them then and you could still do it without them. But he deserved to have them in his life. So, when Jeremiah had invited you to his graduation, you’d agreed.

It couldn’t be as bad as it was two years ago, right?

———

As soon as you arrive in Cousins, you stop at the hotel room that you’d booked for the two of you. Sure, you were okay with being here, but that didn’t mean you wanted to stay at the house.

You shoot Jeremiah a text to tell him you’re near and he tells you he’ll be waiting outside. You text Carmen to tell him you’re already considering turning back.

There was just something so strange about seeing these streets again, these houses, these places that held so many memories. And, as you near the water, the house that held more memories for you than anywhere in the world.

True to his word, as you pull up into the driveway, Jeremiah is waiting on the steps for you.

He hurries straight over to the car before you’ve even stepped out.

“Oh my god it’s so good to see you!” He grins, wrapping his arms around you tightly.

“You too Jere, I’ve missed you,” You squeeze him in return, “Thanks for inviting me.”

“Wh-“ His face drops a little when he catches sight of the seats in the back of your car, “Why do you have a-“

“Um, yeah,” You laugh a little, “I might’ve forgot to mention I was bringing a plus one.”

You open the side door to the back seats and unclamp the car seat from the chair, lifting it out.

“Jere, this is Kylo,” You let out a shaky breath, “My son.”

Jeremiah’s face drops, dumbfounded, “Oh m- I mean I- Congratulations! He looks exactly like you.”

You chuckle, “I’m sorry I didn’t mention him, I just didn’t know how to say it over a text.”

Jeremiah shakes his head, “Don’t apologise. Come on, nobody’s home, you can come inside.”

He takes your baby bag from you as you carry Kylo into the empty house, a flood of memories hitting you as you do. Nothing had changed here and yet everything had changed with you.

“Do you feel like you’re ready to see everyone?” Jeremiah asks, sitting down beside you on the couch.

“Not in the slightest,” You shake your head, “But I can’t wait any longer.”

“You’re right,” Jeremiah nods, “From what I’ve heard, they’re all just ready for you to come home.”

You smile, lifting Kylo out of his seat, “I’m ready for him to have a family too.”

Jeremiah wraps an arm around your shoulder and squeezes.

“Oh shit, I think that might be their-“ He stops himself, “Yeah, that’s them. Are you okay?”

You take a deep breath and shift your position on the couch, “I’m okay.”

You were far from it. You were sure your mind was racing a million miles a minute, and every muscle in your body was tense. You were sure Kylo could feel it too, whinging in your arms. Part of you wanted to run, but you’d done enough of that two years ago. Not anymore.

“Hey, Jere, who the hell is parked in the-“ It’s Steven’s voice first, “Oh my fucking god!”

He runs into the lounge and freezes instantly, his eyes widening, his mouth agape.

“Hey Steven,” You smile, standing up from the couch.

“You- uh- you…”

Your Mom, Belly and Susannah walk in shortly after, all of them stopping just as your brother had.

“(Y/n)…” Belly looks at you like you’re a piece she’s been missing, “It’s so good to see you.”

“Is this…” Laurel looks down at the boy in your arms.

“This is Kylo, my son,” You look up at her, “Your grandson.”

Her face both lifts and falls at the same time, unsure of what to say.

“Can I?” Laurel asks you, looking down at him, and back to you.

“Of course,” You hand him over, fixing his head into her arms.

Laurel gasps at the contact, smiling gently down at the boy as her eyes fill with tears.

“I’m-“ You clear your throat, no apologies, “I know it’s been a while. But a lot has changed, and I want you to be a part of his life. I want him to have his family.”

Belly steps forward and stretches her arms out to you, stepping once more to engulf you in her arms, her head burying on your shoulder.

“I’m so glad you’re back,” She whispers, sobbing a little into your neck as she tightens her grip.

You smile and hug her just as tightly back, “Me too. I’ve missed you.”

“Alright alright don’t leave me out,” Steven groans, squashing both of you in a hug of his own, towering taller than both of you now.

Belly pulls back and sniffs and you lift your hands to her cheeks, wiping her eyes.

“We’re okay, okay?” You nod at her, the same phrase you used to tell her when the two of you ever argued as kids.

Belly nods, squeezing your hands, “Okay.”

“Oh honey,” Laurel passes Kylo to Susannah who takes him with a bright smile, before your Mom turns to you, “I don’t even know what to say. I had no idea that you… I mean I didn’t even… I’m so sorry I wasn’t there.”

You shake your head, “It was me too. We both needed the space, right? We all did.”

She shakes her head too, “I’m just so sorry, I should’ve been there.”

You smile, “You’re here now.”

She steps forward and hugs you too, feeling so much smaller against you than she ever did before, perhaps you just feeling taller.

“You’re a Mom,” Her voice breaks against you, “I’m a Grandma.”

You chuckle and step back from her, “So much to catch you up on.”

Susannah hands Kylo over to Belly as he gets passed around to the waiting arms and she wraps you in a hug of your own, whispering something about how this family had missed you and it hadn’t been the same without you there.

But there was still one piece missing.

You sit down on the couch and Laurel and Susannah sit on either side of you. Belly, Jere and Steven all sit on the coffee table across from you as if they can’t possibly be too far away from you.

“I can’t believe you’re back in Cousins,” Belly smiles, “This is surreal.”

You chuckle, “Yeah, it’s weird. I just couldn’t miss watching Jere graduate.”

He grins, “I’m just glad you accepted the offer.”

Belly passes Kylo over to Steven who holds him as if he’s the most fragile object in the world.

You laugh a little at the sight, pulling out your phone and snapping a photo of the pair. You’d send it to Carmen later - a little sign of ‘hey, my family haven’t completely disowned me’.

“Okay, I have to ask the questions,” Laurel squeezes your arm, “How did this happen?”

“Well, Kylo was born about two months ago. I was dating a boy called Carmen in my first year of college, possibly the nicest guy ever but we realised we were better as friends. And a bit later I found out I was pregnant. He was there the whole time, don’t worry, and we’re surprisingly really good at co-parenting,” You explain, “I know it’s not conventional but, god, I think I was made to be a Mom.”

Steven laughs, “Yeah you got that from raising us three idiots,” He glances to Jere and Belly.

You grin. You’d never considered that when you were growing up. That mothering those three, losing so much of your childhood. It was setting you up for this. For mothering your own child, for bringing him up in your own way.

“He’s a pretty chill baby too,” You comment, “Like sleeps through the night, only wakes up once for a bottle. He even sits into some of my classes.”

“You’re still carrying on with college?” Laurel looks at you slightly shocked.

“Of course, I’ll just graduate with a toddler on my hip,” You beam down at your son in Steven’s arms, “I don’t need to lose my life because I’m taking care of him.”

Laurel looks at you with tears in her eyes before dropping her head to rest on your shoulder, like she’s trying to keep as close to you as she can. You don’t tense under her touch.

———

Later in the day, Jere, Belly and Steven have gone to the store for supplies and Susannah is setting up some bits for Jere’s graduation.

“Hey, do you need any help with anything?” You ask Laurel as she walks into the kitchen, “Kylo’s just had his bottle so I’m free if you need me to help.”

He’s strapped in a wrap to your chest napping against you.

“Oh god no you relax, we don’t need you to help,” Laurel encourages, “Sit down or something.”

“Come on Mom, I can help. What do you want me to do?”

She looks at you and sighs, “I think I spent 18 years asking you to do far too much, maybe I need to be making up for that.”

You clear your throat, “I don’t think that’s how it works.”

“I know, I know it’s not,” She shakes her head, “I just… I don’t even feel like you’re my daughter anymore. You’re so grown up, it’s like… you’re too much of an adult to be mine.”

You nod, “Yeah, well, a lot changed.”

“I hate that things got to the point where you felt you had to leave. I mean, I know everything happened with Belly and Conrad but I was just as much to blame, wasn’t I?”

You run your hand over the wrap across your chest where Kylo lay, “I never got a chance to be a kid, Mom. Not properly. It felt like my whole life Id been running one step ahead of them all so that I could catch them before they fell, shaping my whole life around making sure that they were in line and okay and that I was doing enough for you and for them but also making sure my whole life was perfect so that you weren’t disappointed and… it was draining.”

Laurel looks at you with a pained expression, her shoulders dropping with the weight of realisation.

“I went to college to get away from every shitty feeling that all of that gave me. I got away to finally be my own person, for once in my life just think about me,” You smile, “And it was good for me. I healed. I went to a therapist, I cried, I figured out my shit. I’m a different person now but I’ll always be your daughter. And I want Kylo to have his grandma.”

“I want that too,” Laurel beams, “(Y/n) I… I know I never know how to say these things but I’m so proud of you, honestly.”

Before you can respond, the front door clicks open and your head whips around quickly, expectant of who could be walking through.

“He’s at work,” Laurel comforts you, “He’ll be back tonight.”

“I-“

“I’m still your Mom, I know these things.”

You laugh in response as the other three all come into the kitchen, carrying bags of groceries.

“Oooh here Kylo I got you a present,” Steven rummages through the bags to find what he was looking for and eventually pulls out a small brown teddy bear, “Just securing my spot as favourite uncle.”

You grin, taking the bear, “Thank you Uncle Steven.”

“Oooh, we’ve got the beer in the trunk,” Jeremiah reminds him.

“Shit, yeah, we’ll be right back!” Steven says and both of them hurry back out.

“Beer?” You raise your brows at Belly.

She laughs, looking down at the bags, “Yeah, Steven managed to get a fake.”

“Of course he did,” You shake your head, “Want some help unpacking?”

“No, no, I got it,” She encourages, “You’ve got your hands full.”

You wiggle both of your hands in front of her, “The perks of this thing is that both of my hands are free, Bels. Don’t tread on eggshells around me, honestly.”

“Okay, this one is light,” She pushes one bag towards you.

Both of you potter about in silence putting away their food and it’s as if neither of you wants to break the comfortable quiet. This was the most time you’d spent together in two years, and you felt like strangers to each other.

“So, how’s everything going with you?” You ask her, turning back to the kitchen island.

“I’m good,” She nods, “I’m not…” Belly clears her throat, “I’m not seeing anyone.”

You laugh, “Did you not know how to tell me?”

She smiles and hits your arm, “It’s awkward, okay?”

You chuckle at your sister, somehow catching such a glimpse of yourself in her expression.

“We actually… me and Conrad… we ended things not long after you left,” Belly clears her throat, “It was for the best.”

“Bels I didn’t…”

“Don’t worry, it wasn’t because of you. I just think Conrad never really knew what he wanted, and maybe I didn’t either. I thought I was in love with that boy since I could remember, but I don’t think that was love. It was just the idea of him.”

You nod, “Well, younger Belly would probably thank you for figuring that out. But, tell me, is there anyone new on the scene?”

Before she can respond, the boys come tumbling in the front door again and you watch her eyes follow Jeremiah as he moves towards you both. There’s a brightness in them, one you’d only seen in your own when you were with Conrad. That was the feeling she was looking for.

“Jeremiah?!” You mouth to her and Belly widens her eyes at you in warning to not say anything more.

You raise your hands in surrender but give her a somewhat approving look, one that makes her cheeks ignite.

This was a pocket of home that you’d missed. One you didn’t realise you needed. Your siblings, this house, your family. It would always be important to you. And something about it felt even more magical now that you got to experience it with Kylo.

———

You find yourself focused on the sound of the door as if you can wish it to come sooner. Though you’re not sure why. You want to see him but you have no idea what to say to him. You have so much to tell him but you’re not even sure he’ll want to see you. Did he still hate you? Had he ever hated you? Would he hate you for not being here, for leaving?

You busy yourself with fixing the blanket in Kylo’s car seat. Jere and Steven had just gone to collect your stuff from the hotel - you’d agreed to stay at the house now.

And then it goes.

The sound of keys in the door, the door closing behind a familiar pair of feet. Rushed steps up the stairs, a left turn until they’re coming towards you.

And then your bedroom door opens, and a single figure stands in the doorway, slightly breathless.

“I saw your car on the drive.”

You stop in your tracks, the car seat behind your legs.

“I saw your car in the drive and I-“ Conrad begins again, “You’re home.”

You don’t have a chance to respond as he strides over and hugs you as if you’re a lifeline. His head buries into you and his arms around you as if he’s been needing you for years. His eyes are closed against you and you feel him inhale as if your presence had knocked every breath from his lungs.

And for a moment you’re frozen.

Until your arms kick into gear and they throw themselves around him too, holding him just as tight like you’re the only things holding each other up.

You feel him shift against you, that sort of shocked pause.

“(Y/n)…” His voice is quiet as he pulls away from you, “Is this…”

You step to the side to let him go past you as Conrad crouches down to the floor, his whole body cautious.

“This is Kylo.”

“Kylo,” Conrad grins, “You always said that’s the name you wanted for a boy. Do you remember? When we went to the boardwalk and there was that name on the-“

“The leaderboard for the go karts,” You grin, “I can’t believe you remembered that.”

“I can’t believe you did too, you stuck to your word,” He smiles, talking softly as if he doesn’t want to disturb the tiny bundle looking up at him.

Conrad’s fingers are at either side of the car seat and Kylo reaches up to grip onto his thumb. Con laughs like a sort of gasp, as if it is choked in his throat.

“I’m so happy you’re here,” He half-whispers the words and you’re not sure at first if it’s to you or to the boy in front of him.

But you settle on it being both.

Conrad looks back at you and breaks into an even wider grin, standing back up, “Can you just… tell me everything.”

He sits himself down on your bed and you sit down beside him. And this is it. This the final bit of home you were waiting on.

You and Conrad. Him and you. The piece you’d been waiting for.

———

The following morning, you’re up early with Kylo. You carry him downstairs and go about fixing up a bottle for him, the two of you resting on the couch whilst he drinks.

There’s a text from Carmen on your phone.

Hope they don’t hate you too much x

You shoot back a quick response of reassurance and send him a photo of Kylo smiling at you from last night.

Just as Kylo finishes his bottle, there’s a sound from the stairs creaking as someone comes down.

“Morning,” It’s Conrad, dragging a hand over his eyes as he does.

“Hey,” You return softly, “Why are you up so early?”

“Couldn’t sleep,” He grumbles, still in a half asleep state.

He drops down onto the couch next to you and smiles at Kylo, reaching out a finger to tickle his chest.

“Hey, could you do me a favor?” You ask him, “I need to change his diaper but the bag’s upstairs.”

“Yeah sure, what’s it look like?”

“It’s a black one, not the one with the handle but with the straps, and it’s like-“ You pause as you notice him watching you more and more confused, blinking at your explanation, “Okay, I’ll get the bag. Can you just watch him for a second?”

“That’s much easier,” Conrad grins and shifts on the couch so that he can hold the baby in his arms.

You stand up and head towards the door, hurrying upstairs to find the bag.

When you come back down, Conrad has Kylo stretched across his legs, his little feet hitting Conrad’s stomach and his head resting against his knees. He’s smiling down at him and Kylo grins tiredly up, giggling when Conrad tickles under his arms.

“You’re a natural,” You grin, coming down to sit beside him.

He looks up at you and raises his brows, “You think?”

“Well, he seems to like you,” You point out, not wanting to disturb the moment between them.

Conrad wiggles his hands beneath Kylo’s head and lifts him up, looking at you, “Where do you want me to put him?”

You snap back into reality, “Oh, right, yeah I’ve got a mat.”

He lowers the baby down onto it and then looks at you like he’s awaiting further instruction, “Come on, tell me what to do.”

“You want to change his diaper?” You laugh, “I can do it.”

“I’ve never done one before. I want to learn.”

“Alright, here,” You hand him over the wipes and a fresh diaper.

He’s far too slow when he starts and Kylo starts to wriggle on the mat, impatient of course.

“Does this thing not stay still?” Conrad grumbles, tongue between his lips as he concentrates on the task, his face grimacing just a little at the state of the dirty diaper.

“Put that one in here,” You hold out a diaper bag for him to dispose of it, “Alright, now wipe and new diaper. But make sure he’s covered - he’s a boy so that stuff can go everywhere.”

Conrad’s eyes widen as he takes your instruction, fixing the new diaper on - just a little wonky.

“There we go, fresh as a daisy,” He grins proudly at his accomplishment, “I think I could be pretty good at this.”

“Well that’s task two - making him laugh being task one,” You nod, “Not bad, Fisher.”

He lifts him back up onto the couch and lays him down beside you, Conrad sitting on the floor just in front of him like he’s already prepared to catch him.

He lets Kylo grab at the end of his hoodie, laughing at him before he turns to you.

“So, how does it all work? Are you… with someone?”

You shake your head, “We split up before I found out I was pregnant. But we’re really good friends, so it works. He helps out a lot.”

Conrad nods, “Well that sounds healthy.”

“What can I say? I’m mature now,” You joke.

“I think you always were,” He scoffs, “Especially compared to the rest of us.”

Both of you fall silent again and Kylo fills the space by gargling in some form of baby talk.

“What about you?” You clear your throat, drawing your legs to your chest on the couch, “Are you seeing anyone Mr Stanford?”

He scoffs, looking down at his hands, “No, no, I think I needed to stay away from all that for a little while. Clear my head.”

“And did you find anything in that clarity?” You taunt, yearning for the same connection the two of you had so long ago.

He looks at you for a second and pauses, “I guess I finally figured out what I want.”

For a brief moment you’re drawn to him, something in those eyes and that voice. But you tear yourself away.

“Well I’m glad the break was worth it,” You smile, looking away from him, “Sometimes that’s all that you need.”

You look down at your son and feel the same swell of pride you had when they first handed him to you in the delivery room. The same realisation that this was it now - this was everything.

“You know this place changed when you left,” Conrad comments, “And it’s changed again now you’re back.”

“Yeah, well, I always had that effect,” You wiggle your brows jokingly, lifting Kylo up from the couch to rest him on your lap.

Conrad pushes himself up to sit on the couch beside you and both of you fall silent in the seemingly empty house. He watches you with Kylo and is sure for a second that he’s looking at someone else. But it’s you. The one that was always made for this.

“I’m sorry if I-“

“I’m sorry if I-“

You both speak at the same time and look at each other with hints of smiles.

“You first,” Conrad encourages.

You take a deep breath, “I’m sorry if I made you feel like you couldn’t be with Belly. She told me you guys ended things not long after and I just hate thinking that I was… I don’t know, that I ruined things,” You shake your head, “I know it was forever ago.”

“You didnt ruin anything. Me and Belly… we… I think I always knew that she liked me. And I just, I hated the thought of breaking her heart. Like it would be my fault if I didn’t feel the same. And that night, I don’t know what it was, I just convinced myself that I could feel the same as she did,” He takes a deep breath too, like both of you are fighting for air against tightened chests, “But we’re must better as friends, we both know that. And I’d never… I never did… feel that way about her. I was just confused.”

You nod, “Now you go.”

“I’n sorry if I ever made you feel like you weren’t good enough,” Conrad exhales, “Because I know that’s how you felt, and I never ever wanted you to think like that.”

“Con…”

“Im serious (Y/n),” He shifts in his seat so that he’s facing you properly, “I was younger and naive and I knew that I liked you and I just… suppressed it. Because I knew if I started anything with you then I’d want that to be it, and I wasn’t ready for you to break my heart.”

You laugh a little, your eyes pricking just slightly with tears, “You think I’m a heartbreaker, Fisher?”

Conrad smiles, his cheeks flushed a little, his muscles visibly relaxed from what they were. He’d missed this. You, the way you knew him, the way you read him. He’d missed it all.

———

“We’ll watch him, you can go and shower,” Belly assures you, “And I’ll make sure Steven doesn’t do anything stupid.”

You’d spent the day in and around the pool with Belly, Steven and Jeremiah whilst Conrad had gone to work. They’d bought a float for Kylo at the store and were all impatient to use it - taking a thousand photos of him with his hat on laying back in the float.

“Alright, well just shout me if there’s anything,” You encourage, “I’ll just use-“

“(Y/n),” Steven says in a calm tone, “Relax, we’ve got him, I promise.”

You nod and step off of the lounger you’d been on, walking around the side of the house to where the outdoor shower still stood.

This place. It held memories you’d wanted to forget.

Before you step in, your phone starts ringing and you glance down to see Carmen’s contact on your screen, you accept the call and press the speaker button on your phone.

“Hey (y/l/n), how’s it going?” He says as soon as you pick up.

“It’s going well, yeah,” You turn back around to the garden where Belly was holding Kylo in her arms, “They’re all so excited to meet him.”

“Do they know about his super cool, super helpful, super present Dad yet?” Carmen taunts.

“They do,” You chuckle into the microphone, “They’re glad I haven’t been doing it on my own.”

“Yeah, well, they would’ve known that if they tried-“

“Carmen,” You sigh, “Less hating them, yeah? It’s going well.”

“Okay, you’re right, but I’m still not their biggest fans,” He comments, “What about the long lost love of your life?”

“Oh my god will you stop?” You widen your eyes at his words.

“Come on, I know that’s who you were most nervous to see,” He returns, “How’s it been? Do you still… you know, feel that way about him?”

“I-“ You glance down at the exact spot you’d been stood in two years ago, when you’d told Conrad the truth, “It’s Conrad, you know? He makes me laugh and he listens to me and he feels like… it feels like the piece of me that I’ve been missing.”

Carmen laughs, “And I’m guessing you haven’t told him that.”

“I already ruined things with that boy once, I can’t do it again.”

“Ruin things? (Y/l/n) I think you’d be telling him what he’s been waiting to hear for two years.”

Before you can say anything, the sound of a twig snapping behind you makes you jump from your thoughts and you turn around to see Conrad stood just metres from you.

“Um, Carmen, I have to go,” You stumble over your words into the microphone, “I’ll talk to you later.”

“Wear protection!” He yells down the phone before you hang up, your cheeks flushing bright red as you look back at Conrad.

“Sorry I didn’t mean to-“ Conrad mumbles, scratching at the back of his neck, “I just got back from work.”

“Right, yeah, of course, how- how was it?”

“Good,” Conrad nods, stuffing his hands into his pockets, “I didn’t mean to listen in, or anything. I just… I don’t even normally walk this way, I don’t know why I did but I thought I could hear people and so I thought maybe you were outside, not that I was looking for you, but well I was-“

“Con,” You interrupt, “It’s okay.”

He smiles, taking a second to breathe, “That was Carmen?”

You look down at your phone in your hand, “Yeah, just calling to check how I’m getting on. It’s the first time he’s been away from Kylo too.”

Conrad nods in understanding, “Yeah, of course, I bet that’s weird for him.”

“Yeah I don’t think I could ever leave Ky now, it’s a parent thing, I guess,” You scratch at a patch on your arm as the nerves seem to overtake you, “I should probably… you know, I need to shower before tonight and I-“

“Yeah, yeah, I’ll let you get on,” Conrad raises his hands and goes to step past you as you step into the booth of the shower.

You don’t make any move after that, thinking of every single thing you could’ve just said to him. How two years ago every word came to you all at once and, now, you can’t find a single right word to say. You feel your bottom lip tremble just slightly at the thought of everything you could’ve just told him but you shake it off.

“Hey, (Y/n),” Conrad’s voice speaks from the exact spot you’d just left him in, “What did he want you to tell me?”

You feel every bone in your body freeze at those words, practically sending a shiver down your spine. Your hands go numb, your eyes glazing over, your throat seemingly closing off any words.

As you turn around back to the entrance of the shower, there he is. Stood on the path with a look of hope in his eyes that you thought you’d never see again from Conrad.

“What did he want you to say?” He persists, eyes burning into you.

You exhale deeply, the tension in your shoulders dropping as if you’ve lost hope, “That I never should’ve walked away from you that night. And I hate myself every day for not fighting for you more, for not standing there and telling you that I’d wait for you. I’d wait for you in every life if that’s what it took for you to realise that you loved me. And I know I shouldn’t and I know it’s different now because I have a son and that’s complicated and you don’t have to want that or feel like you have to-“

He strides forward then, his hands coming up to cup either side of your face, his lips crashing into yours as if they’re returning home for the first time in forever. It’s messy and rushed and heated but neither of you care, both relaxing into a feeling you never thought you’d feel. Your hands grip at the material of his t-shirt like you’re convincing yourself that he’s real. And he is. It’s all real.

Your lips pull away first, rushing to catch every ounce of breath that had just been knocked from your lungs.

“I’d wait for you, (y/n). In this life, the next and the next after that, I’d wait for you too,” Conrad confirms, his eyes searching in both of yours, “This is it, okay? This is what I want, it’s what I’ve always wanted.”

You let out a laugh, somewhere verging on a sob as every emotion of every missed day seems to come out of you, “We’ve waited long enough, don’t you think?”

Conrad smiles, his hand moving to your chin to pull you into his lips once more.

“You have no idea how long I’ve been waiting to do that,” He mumbles just millimetres from your lips.

“I think I have some idea,” You return with a smile, kissing him quickly.

This was it. In this life, the next one and the one after that - this was where you could be truly happy.

[abbysimsfun]

Sims In Bloom: Generation 2 Pt. 77 (A Baby and a Surprise!)

Heather went into labour at the tail end of fall. She left work and phoned Conrad, who set aside his casework to meet her at the hospital.

When he arrived, he called Ash on the phone he was too young for - but Nancy had insisted on it. "Hey bud, are you going to be okay at home for a bit? Mrs. Goth's on her way over to hang out until we get back from the hospital, but we might not get home until you're in bed."

"Gord's here; I'm good."

"Just remember to lock the door and don't answer for anyone but Mrs. Goth."

"I know," he said casually. "Are you at the hospital, too? Is mommy okay?"

"She'll be fine, but when we come home we'll be bringing your little brother or sister."

"That's pretty cool." He still didn't completely understand, but everyone around him was happy about it, so Ash was happy, too. "Are you going to get married like Daddy and Miko?"

Conrad paused. "Do you think your mom and I should get married?"

Thoughtful and smart, Ash considered the question. "I don't know what you should do, but sometimes I don't know what to call you."

"What do you mean, buddy? Conrad's just fine."

"I mean at school, when people ask if you're my stepdad."

Conrad gaped. "What do you tell them?"

"I say sort of. Don't people who love each other get married?"

He laughed. "It's about a bit more than that."

"How much more?"

He didn't have an answer. Not for a five-year-old. And maybe, if he really thought about it, he didn't have an answer for himself. But his thoughts were interrupted by some noise on Ash's end of the line. "Mrs. Goth just got here and she wants to teach me to play chess. She won't let me wear my hat! She says it frames my face wrong."

Conrad shook his head with a laugh. "It's not too cold out tonight. Just humour her and try not to beat her too badly once she's taught you how to play."

Ash grumbled playfully. "It's not my fault games are easy."

Conrad hung up and returned his attention to Heather, who sat on the bed doing breathing exercises between contractions. This was her third time in labour and delivery, and Conrad was far more nervous. "What was all that about?" she wondered.

"He asked if we were going to get married like Malcolm and Miko, but now Mrs. Goth has him focused on learning to play chess."

Heather smiled. "Malcolm says he's always asking him and Miko to have a wedding he can be invited to since they eloped without telling anyone. He'd scam all of us for that much wedding cake."

She grimaced as her contractions returned, breathing through them as Conrad felt helpless to soothe her pain. "What can I do?"

"Just be here. And get me ice chips, maybe."

"I can do that."

As Heather's labour progressed, they moved downstairs to a birthing room. Conrad swayed with her between contractions. "Why do you look so...concerned?" she asked.

"I'm not. I was just thinking about what Ash said earlier."

"When he asked if we're getting married?"

"He said he doesn't know what to call me because I'm not technically his stepdad. We know we're a team, and I know what we said after Hazel's wedding, but marriage means more to some people than just the certificate."

"What do you mean?"

"I think I want to get married."

"You think...?"

"Heather Nesbitt, I want to marry you."

"Not today, I hope." She grunted with discomfort. (He never fails to make her flirty but today is the exception, pushing out a human and with a full cache of uncomfortable moodlets drowning out everything else.) "I'm sorry, I love you...I was never the girl who dreamed of planning her wedding. I want to get married. Wait. Are you proposing?"

"You're hanging on a little tight for me to let go to get down on one knee, but whenever and however you want to get married, I'll be there."

She smiled as they swayed. "I was going to say the same to you."

"I am going to tell our friends you're my fiancee now, though."

"I like that."

After another contraction, he helped her back into bed and she looked at him with a serious expression. "Nothing will change once we get married, right? We'll still always be us. We're a team, and we'll always tell each other what we're feeling?"

"Married or not, we're a team." Leaning forward he kissed her head, gently caressing her hands with his own. "I'm with you forever. You, me, Ash, and this wild one right here. I love you."

"Are you two teammates ready to push?" Dr. Serra interrupted their quiet moment with a smile. "You should be fully dilated now."

"I'm so ready to get this baby out of me, Dr. Serra. If they kick me one more time I might explode from the inside out."

After one final exam, Dr. Serra nodded. "It's time."

Heather laboured with Conrad by her side. In the early hours of the morning, Dr. Serra announced he could see the head. "It won't be long now, Heather. Just keep pushing."

Conrad held her while she worked to bring their child into the world. "You're the strongest woman I know," he assured her. "The baby's almost here."

"The shoulders are out, Heather. One more big push."

Heather complied with a grimace, and her efforts were met with the wailing cries of a healthy infant.

"Congratulations, you guys. It's a..." Dr. Serra paused for dramatic effect as he passed the infant to Heather's waiting arms. "...Girl! You have a daughter!"

Heather smiled, holding their baby girl against her chest as Conrad looked on in awe. Ten fingers, ten toes, and a healthy set of lungs - little Lavender Helena Gordon was finally here!

With winter just around the corner, how would the Nesbitt-Gordon household adjust as a family of four (+ 4 pets)? ->

<- Previous Chapter | Gen 2 Start | Gen 1 Summary | Gen 1 Start

NOTE: I didn't plan their engagement at all. They did this entirely on their own and this is the stuff I live for with this game. After Heather went into labour, Ash got a text from Conrad, and it was the whole 'I found a ring, what should I say?' advice cycle. And since it's technically against the rules for them to get married, I could have said no. I wanted to say yes! And after Ash was so supportive of Malcolm and Miko, and with how much he loves Conrad, I couldn't bear for him to be the one to say no. So I split the difference and said 'decide for yourself.'

Without skipping a beat, Heather and Conrad decided for themselves to get engaged! This isn't in the challenge rules, but they wanted this, I definitely wanted this, and I think we all wanted this! And I loved so much that Conrad asked Ash. Their bond is so deep. He's been in Ash's life since before he was two, which really isn't that much less time than Malcolm, since Ash's bio-dad skipped the first year of his life being a dick.

There was the issue that Heather wouldn't propose, but technically Conrad didn't propose, either. She's so unflirty and content as things stand, and even though this engagement was autonomous and that's everything, it didn't come with any animations. So since it all went down while Heather was in labour, I reshot everything in a second save and gave the very important moment the storyline it definitely deserved. (This also explains why they're in many different hospital rooms and beds while in labour but shhhh! It's an illusion, it's all happening at the same time!)

NOTE 2: All the poses used for this post are from the New Life pose pack by @eclypt0sims, which I think is spectacular! But I don't know how to use toddler sliders, so it's angles to disguise that there's no baby in those shots. But there could be if you have skills!

[ist4rgirlo]

── 𝐛𝐞𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐝 - 𝐜.𝐟 : 𝐕

Summary: Being Belly & Steven’s older sibling has it’s pros and cons. protecting them and taking care of them is a must, but do you really have to put their feelings first instead of your own?

Prev ; Next || Conrad Fisher x fem!reader || My blog

Warnings: angst, fluff, talking about panic attacks, swearing, crying (lmk if i missed anything!)

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It was the morning after the incident — thank god I woke up in my own room now. I was still exhausted, tired from last night. I never thanked that person that helped me last night, I never thanked him.

It was 9 in the morning, I decided to just stay in my room. I can’t face them — I just can’t, how can I? I’m still hurt from it, from what they said to me.

There was a knock on my door. “Come in!” I sat up and looked at the door — It was Steven. “Hey sis, goodmorning” Steven walked towards me, he was holding a plate with food in it. Gosh I love Steven, he was the only one who truly cared.

“Hey Steve” I said, looking up to him — smiling at him. “I got you breakfast” he said, titlting his head. He smiled, raising his shoulders.

I stood up and hugged him. We always had each other even from the start, even when we were little. He understands me and I understand him. That’s what I love about our relationship.

“Thank you, Steve. For everything”

“Ofcourse sis. Anything for you” Steven pulled away, rubbing my shoulders. “So, I heard that you had a panic attack last night. You want to talk about it?” He sat down — asking me to sit down with him. He placed the plate on my lap.

As I started to eat my breakfast, Steven said “It’s okay if you don’t want to, I can understand” looking at me — smiling gently.

I looked back at him “No it’s okay, we can talk about it. Just wanted to ask you, who told you?” He looked down, fidgeting with his fingers. He shouldn’t have asked — he thought.

“Oh uh, it was Conrad”

Ofcourse it was him, he was the one who helped me. He was the one who went up to me last night, at the beach.

“Oh, ofcourse” I said looking at him, I smiled — nodding. He just looked at me waiting for an answer. Waiting for me to tell him what the reason was behind my panic attack.

“It was just too much for me last night. I guess I just exploded. I never meant to yell at mom or Belly, I was just too tired. It was like I was in the middle of everything — it wss my first time having that incident, Steve. I thought I wouldn’t make it.” I told him, plopping down on my bed — sighing deeply, putting my arm over my eyes.

“I am so sorry that happened to you sis, I should’ve been there by your side — defending you, I should’ve followed you.” Steven’s voice was filled with worry, with disappointment. I might’ve struggled a lot last night, he thought.

Hearing the sadness in his voice, I sat up — putting my arms around his shoulder “Steve you shouldn’t be sorry, it’s okay. I’m okay now, don’t worry” I looked at him then I leaned my head on his shoulder while he leaned his head on top of my head.

“I got you always, sis. You know that”

“I do, Steve. I also got you, always. I am so thankful for you”

We stayed like that for a moment until Steven had to go because Laurel was calling for him — he had this thing with Shayla — it was probably about the deb ball.

TIME SKIP

After mopping around in my room and doing god know’s what, I decided to go get ready to go out. I couldn’t stay here in my room all day so I decided to go to the beach and get some fresh air.

As I walk downstairs, I saw Susannah — she was with Belly & Laurel in the living room. “Goodmorning, Y/N!” Susannah greeted me, I greeted her back then walked out of the door — completely ignoring my sister and my mom.

Conrad and Jeremiah were in the living room, playing games. I hesistated between going to him or not but I chose not to go to Conrad just to thank him for last night — it’ll just add fuel to whatever heat is going on between me and Belly. It was best to keep quiet and not say anything.

I went out of the door and went straight to the beach.

For me, beaches have a soothing ambiance that nothing can beat. The earthy and salty scents of the sea breeze. The sounds of the ocean and gulls. It calmed me, it is my way of coping.

“Hi, pretty girl” It was Jeremiah — I looked up to him then I pat beside me, telling him to sit down. “Hi Jere” I said smiling. He sat down letting me lean on him.

He put his arms around me, rubbing my shoulders “How are you? I heard you had a fight with Belly yesterday, they were talking about it earlier.” He said — brows furrowed.

“Interesting, I thought they were over it, I guess not. But yeah, we had a fight yesterday but I’m okay now. I don’t really care anymore” I shrugged — not really wanting to waste my time just thinking about that stupid fight that we had.

Jeremiah chuckled “It’s good that you’re unbothered about it right now. You shouldn’t waste your time on that, enjoy your last week here in Cousins!” I just smiled and nodded. I don’t want to promise him anything, knowing that I already made up my mind.

Jeremiah stood up, offering me a hand “You wanna go get ice cream?” he smiled widely — I nodded, giggling.

“So what you gonna get?”

“The usual”

“Coffee” we said at the same time. Jeremiah made a face, a dirty face.

“Ew” he said, teasing me. “Uh don’t you ever! I never teased you about your obsession with milk” I elbowed him in the stomach, he looked at me chuckling.

“I’m just kidding” he said smiling — wrapping an arm around my shoulder as we walked towards the ice cream shop.

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It was night now, they were all eating dinner but i’m here in the pool swimming — I didn’t feel like eating, it was too awkward for me plus I was still full from earlier because Jeremiah spoiled me with food too much.

I always loved swimming, ever since I was little. Swimming and the beach are one of the things that I love. Swimming just makes me feel a lot better, it make me keep my mind off of things.

I swam and just enjoyed the coolness of the pool. As I returned to the surface — I saw Conrad, a plate beside him, filled with food. He wasn’t smoking this time, he was just watching me swim.

“Hey” Conrad said, looking at me — smiling. I looked at him, I didn’t want to talk to him — I wanted to ignore, to get away from him. I can’t keep hurting my sister. Why is it so hard?

“Oh hi” I turned around, not wanting to look in his eyes. “Uhm, I got you food” Conrad said, I turned to him — I saw him holding up the plate with my favorite, “I made it” he smiled.

I turned and looked at him — confused, why was he doing this? Belly didn’t tell him that we had a fight? Did no one tell him about yesterday? but it’s impossible, he was the one who helped me when I was having a panic attack — maybe he never asked.

He looked at me, his smile faltered. “Hey what’s wrong? why are you ignoring me?” he asked, his voice laced with worry. “I am not ignoring you, Conrad. I’m just confused why you are here and why you made me that food” I looked at him — disappointment started to fill his face, his heart was slowly breaking.

“Oh, i’m sorry” he said, putting the plate down — looking down. I needed to do this — so he would stay away from me. I had to do it, for my sister, for me.

I swam to him — still keeping distance. “You don’t have to say sorry, I guess they just never told you what happened yesterday.” Conrad tilted his head, confused about what happened tomorrow.

“Well I never really asked.”

“Even though you saw me have a panic attack last night?”

“Yeah, it was your business. I didn’t want to just butt in it. I respect your privacy too” Conrad looked at me with his gentle blue eyes.

How can I stay away from him when this is how he cares for me?

“Me, my mom and Belly fought yesterday” I said before swimming away from him.

Conrad stood up, “What? Why did you guys fight?” his voice laced with concern, his brows furrowed — his lips started to frown.

“Well, Belly saw me getting out of your room yesterday” Conrad frowned, his shoulder slumped. Why were you the only one that Belly yelled at — he thought. Why did you have to take the blame?

Conrad’s heart was beating so fast, he wanted to hurt himself. He never wanted this, for Belly and Laurel to accuse you of something you didn’t do. “I am so sorry, Y/N. I-I should’ve been there for you, I should’ve defended you. I should’ve taken all the blame”

“Conra-“

“No… no it was all my fault. I shouldn’t have taken you to my room, now.. now Belly and Laurel is mad at you. I am so fucking sorry, i’m so stupid. Fuck!” He sat down, his head was in his hands. His face filled with frustration. He could’ve taken all the blame — he thought, it was his fault afterall.

I swam all the way to him, my hands on his knees. “Conrad it’s okay, breathe. I’m okay now, everything will be alright. Soon” I took his hand and removed it from his face, I caressed his face and wiped his tears.

He started to lean in but I backed away — I know where this was going — that’s what I thought but in his mind, all he wanted to do was hug me, was to be close to me because it felt like he was losing me, like he was going to lose me.

“Soon?” He asked — I swam all the way to the end of the pool and got out of the pool, he stood up — walking towards me, giving me a towel from the chair.

“I’m planning to go back home tomorrow.” I said, turning to him — we were now face to face. He looked at me with his brows furrowed.

“What? Why?” He said trying to reach for my hand but I pulled away. “It’ll just make things easier, Conrad. For everyone, for me.” I said looking up at him.

I had to stay away from him, this was the only way — was to go back early. I wanted to stay here in Cousins, I wanted to stay with Susannah but I just can’t. I can’t enjoy my last week here when all I can think about was about was him and Belly, together.

“You.. you don’t have to do that y/n. Please just stay, mom would want you to stay. I would never go near you again if that was the only reason why you wanted to go back home.” Conrad was panicking — trying to convince me to stay because he knew that whenever I was here, I never wanted to go back home. This time was different.

I looked at him, holding his shoulders gently, “Conrad, I have to do this. It would be easier for me to focus on college.” he pulled me closer and hugged me, his head was on my shoulder.

“I don’t want you to go, I don’t want to wait another year just to see you”

“Please Conrad. Let’s not make this hard for the both of us”

“It’s our last week, just please… please stay” Conrad pulled away, holding my shoulder gently — looking at me in the eyes.

I pulled away, I took my towel and started to walked towards the door. This conversation wouldn’t go anywhere, I don’t think anything can change my decision.

I went inside the house — I saw all of them in living room, Conrad was right behind me. Belly was about to stand up and walk towards me, probably to yell at me again because i’m with Conrad.

“Belly, come on. Stop it” Conrad looked at Belly, stopping her on saying anything bad. Belly looked at him — confused and mad because Conrad was defending me. “Nothing happened, I just talked to her so stop.” Conrad looked at everyone, making sure Laurel heard him too. He walked towards the couch and sat beside Steven.

“I’m planning on leaving tomorrow.” I said, as I walked towards the kitchen to get a drink. Jeremiah stood up from the couch after hearing me say that, “You’re leaving? why? it’s too early plus we’re leaving sunday, just stay.” he said walking towards the kitchen, grabbing me

I shrugged, “Just thought it would make things easier for everyone” I looked down, trying to stop myself from crying. I dont want to leave but they’re making it hard for me to stay.

“Oh special girl, do you really want to do that?” Susannah asked, her eyes filled with worry. She didn’t want me to leave but she didn’t want to push me into something I didn’t want to do.

I looked at her and nodded, “College is coming soon so I need to focus on that.” Laurel looked at me, she knew what the real reason was, she knew I was tired. She knew that I had to get away from her, from Belly, from all the problems.

Belly sat down beside Conrad then leaned her head on him “Well.. do you want me to help you pack?” she asked, looking at me. I looked at her, surprised that she’s talking to me.

“No, It’s alright. I already started packing earlier so I don’t think I need any help.”

“Oh uhm okay, I guess we’ll just see you when we get home?”

I just nodded before going upstairs to shower. I went in my room first to get my clothes then went straight to the bathroom to clean myself. I can finally let my feelings out.

I sat in the bathtub and cried and cried until I had no more tears to shed. In spite of the fact that I was on my last day here, Laurel did not seem to care at all, it hurt me to receive this type of treatment. However, I made the decision to leave early on my own. I must endure the pain, I must endure the suffering but it's okay , the pain will be over soon, it’ll be over tomorrow — I thought. I’m going to be alright.

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It didn't occur to me that Steven was having a difficult time as well, I thought I was the only one having a hard time. As I was crying in the bathroom, I did not realize that he was also crying outside listening to me cry — he was crying because I was crying. The reason he was crying was because he did not know what to do, what to say to me in order to keep me. He knew that no one would ever be able to change my decision. All he wanted was to spend time with his family, with Susannah, Conrad, and Jeremiah. Why did it have to be like this?

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i honestly don’t know why it’s not letting me tag some of you guys :((

i hope you guys enjoy this chapter !! there one or two more chapters then its done :<<

thank you everyone for the love !! lmk if you want to get tagged and if you guys have any requests !!

[cer-rata]

Fic WIP: "“No One Majored In Chemistry (snip #2)"

Damian crossed his arms. “Hello, ‘Champion.’ Is this really necessary?”

Billy shook him by his cape. “I swear I will drop you.”

“You think a fall from this height would kill me?”

“Ten stories? Yes?”

“Ha.” Damian pulled his legs up and crossed them in mid-air to make it look like he was casually sitting, and not being dangled over Gotham. “Anyway, you’re doing this wrong, you’re supposed to pose a question before threatening to drop me. You’d have to threaten to drop me anyway of course, but the order of operations is important if you don’t want to look like a complete psycho.”

Billy hissed. “Damian--”

“Now, if you don’t have a question and just desire to jerk me around, well I must remind you that I am in a committed relationship, and just because he’s not around right now, doesn’t mean--”

“WHY DID YOU TELL MY ROOMMATE WHAT MY DEAL WAS!?” 

Damian froze, and the smug smirk awkwardly fell from his face. “Oh. Uh. Listen--”

“MMMHMMM?!”

“It was an…accident?”

“An accident? An accident? How do you explain my entire shtick by accident?!”

Damian winced and looked away. “I was…under the influence…”

Billy stared at him. “...What…?”

“Not like, recreationally, I don’t--Blockbuster threw me into a brick wall hard enough to aggravate the spine thing.”

“What spine thing--”

“Don’t worry about it. Anyway, I was on a lot of morphine when he came to visit and started talking about his room assignment, and I…I must have just started rambling when he mentioned you by name. I…apologize.”

Billy sighed and picked him up properly (like an infant, because he knew Damian would hate that) and landed on a nearby roof. He set Damian down gently and crossed his arms. “Look…fine. You could have given me a heads up.”

“I could have.” Damian admitted. “I got a little distracted with the murder.”

Billy groaned. It was always some kind of messed up homicide in Gotham. “What murder?”

Damian pulled his mask off and rubbed his eyes. “Conrad’s deceased ex-boyfriend’s mother had her eyes stolen. I…think she was dead before they were removed, but I’m not…entirely sure.” 

Billy’s eyes widened. That sounded like black magic.

“I agree.” Solomon said, “Likely for some kind of cruel augury, or perhaps, more simply due to something those eyes had witnessed.” 

“...Oh. I see.”

“Yeah.”

“Um. You know you really can just call me up if you need--”

“No offense, Batson, but wisdom or not, you’re not exactly known for your detective skills.”

“Unless it’s a magic thing, I’m pretty good with those.”

“...A magic thing.”

“I mean, sure, it’s Gotham, maybe there is a weirdo out there stealing eyeballs, but you didn’t say it was a part of a series of murders right?”

“...I didn’t, no.”

“Right, so generally when someone steals an important body part from a seemingly random person, it’s probably for some messed up ritual. Eyes have a lot of significance.”

Damian cursed under his breath. “In retrospect it’s...obvious. I hate you.”

Billy smiled weakly. “Yeah. Um. Listen though I’m sorry, I’m sure this is rough for you personally--”

“I don’t know how I’m going to explain it when he gets back.” Damian muttered, with an uncharacteristic rawness. He blinked a couple of times and raised his mask towards his face like he was about to put it back on, before stopping and letting his hands fall back to his waist.

“...Anyway, um. You’re here about Garth. I suppose I could attempt to rectify my breach of confidence with…an exchange of information?”

Billy watched for a moment. He caught Damian subtly shifting his weight from one foot to the other like he did as a fidget that most people wouldn’t recognize. One of his three visible, rare anxiety responses. He’s really not okay.

“SHAZAM!” Suddenly Billy was at a height with Damian, but much less well built, he couldn’t help but notice that. 

Damian frowned. “What--”

“I can see your eyes, it’s only fair that you can see mine.” 

Damian glared and looked away. “Stop that--”

“Damian--”

“You’re not here about me, so let’s not--”

“Damian--”

“If you’d like to dangle me again over a freeway or something, I think I’d prefer that to--”

He flinched when Billy put his hands on his shoulders. “Yeah, I do want to know what Garth’s deal is, but that can wait a minute. You wanna talk about it?”

“There is no ‘it’ to talk about, and if there were you know I wouldn’t want to.” Damian tried to make it an irritated hiss, but really, he just sounded like he was deflating. 

“Wisdom of Solomon says that if Conrad gets back and finds out that we’ve let you be isolated and sad the whole summer, he will likely start picking us off one-by-one.” Billy wiggled his eyebrows and Damian groaned. 

“Well…well that seems like a you problem--”

“Bro.”

“What do you want me to say!?”

“Something!”

“There is no guarantee that I will say what you want me to say unless--”

Billy pushed him as hard as he could, and Damian did not move in the slightest. They stared at each other for a moment before Billy let out a loud sigh.

Damian giggled, though. “...Really?”

“You’re annoying!”

“Maybe so. Billy there’s nothing you can do, alright? I’m…figuring things out.”

“This is more than just being lonely?”

“Being lonely is easy, I could teach classes on it. You know, apparently Brazil--”

“Then what is it?”

Damian fidgeted. “I’m…poorly acquainted with regret. Usually it’s easy for me to accept reality and move on, often enough that’s all you can do, if suicide is off the table. But…I don’t know. It’s different this time, I suppose. It’s probably because I can’t listen to him babble on about something stupid to make it easier to pretend that he’s alright. It’s hard to sit in silence and try not to realize that in the math of it all, I’ve probably made his life a lot worse. And he loves me for it. Hell, he only keeps the ring because he’s worried that if he doesn’t, he won’t be able to help me if he needs to. Now he’s off in space in some bootcamp run by crazy alien amazons, agonizing because he wants to be better for me. It’s sick.”

“I don’t think that’s accurate, and I don’t think you actually believe he’d be happier without you in his life.”

Damian ran a hand through his hair, getting gel on his glove in the process. “The entire point of all of this is that we do this work so other people don’t have to. I could have been in his life without letting him throw himself into the crossfire! I didn’t…I couldn’t conceptualize a relationship with someone on the outside, I think. I was uncomfortable with having to be a regular person around him, so I took the first opportunity to pull him in.”

Billy slid his hands up Damian’s shoulders and cupped his cheeks, appreciating Damian not biting him for it. 

“He’s allowed to make his own choices, even if those choices are hard for him, even if they make you happy.”

Damian’s lips twisted. “...He said he thought it was wrong for people to train me to live like I do, that I could be more, that I could make other choices, that I could move on. He believes it enough that he was willing to die to give me the chance to try. He doesn’t get the irony. Idiot.”

Billy looked up at the stars and took a deep breath. “It was kind of messed up to make me the Champion.” He said, looking back into Damian’s eyes, noting the surprise there. “I was a little kid, in a bad place without a lot of options. I didn’t understand what I was agreeing to, how could I? It made a lot of things…hard. Really hard. You shouldn’t…you shouldn’t make a choice like that on a whim, you know? But I still wouldn’t take it back, even thinking about how…how long I’m going to be doing this, or the terrible things I’ve seen, or the awful secrets I know. To me, it’s worth it, because I can say that I, William Batson--”

“Ew--”

“Shut up! I can say that I’ve made some stuff better for other people. People who needed me, people I care about. It’s a gift delivered badly. So he’s right: It IS messed up that we didn’t get to choose. But he did, and he did it out of love. You can’t take that away from him, you just have to accept it, and accept that it’s okay that he picked you to be his person. Because it is. He thinks I’m cute, so clearly his taste has to be fairly decent.”

Damian shut his eyes and shook his head, laughing. “You’re a damn fool.”

“And not a psychic, so you need to, you know, text a guy. Okay? No one wants you to turn into your dad.”

“Wooooow.”

“Sorry.”

Damian snorted. “Alright, you either get a hug or I give you some background on Garth, you do not get both.”

He clearly did not expect Billy to go for the hug.

Which was probably why Billy felt his chest heave a little, and his throat made a weird little noise that one could perhaps describe as a sob.

[cwritesforfun]

TSITP Conrad Fisher x Fem!Reader: Only You

This was a request!! You've been Conrad's friend for years. Conrad took you to the Debutante Ball last summer because your date bailed on you and broke up with you. He realized how he felt about you then and now it's pretty much all he can think about. Y/N = Your Name

Conrad's POV

I'm waiting for Y/N to arrive. She texted me when her flight landed and when she got to her summer house in Cousins Beach. Now I just have to wait until she drives and gets here. I missed her so much. I wish she lived closer and we could hang out more. You have no idea how long I've been wanting to hug her tightly and have our night walks on the beach.

My door swings open and Jeremiah pokes his head in to say "Hey uh I think Y/N is here, but she is on a stressful-sounding call in the front yard. I heard her voice go really high and she's pacing." I nod and thank him before heading outside.

I open the front door and I see Y/N. She's hanging up her phone angrily when I get outside. When she sees me, her eyes light up and she runs over to me. I hug her tightly and swing her around a little.

Upon releasing her from her hug, I help Y/N carry her overnight bag to my bedroom. We then go for our walk on the beach because Y/N kindly asks to go on one.

We're walking on the beach and I notice Y/N deep in thought. I reach for her hand to hold it and I ask, "You okay?" Y/N squeezes my hand and says, "I am just tired of everyone in my hometown. I'm so glad I'm going to college this year. I cannot wait to leave them all. They're so exhausting to be around and they're toxic, plus they treat me like shit." I reply "I'm sorry to hear that. I didn't know they could get worse. It seems like everything was good at the end of the school year." She replies "I thought so too. I ran into this mean girl and my ex-boyfriend who stood me up at the Debutante Ball at the grocery store the other day. She called me ugly and said I don't deserve happiness. She then showed off my ex and talked about how happy she is with him. He didn't say anything that day, but he texted me the next day about how much he missed me. He said his new girlfriend is rude to everyone and that he was sorry. I just said liked his messages because I do not want him in my life in any aspect. I don't like either of them and I truly just dislike them." I reply "Well fuck them and their thoughts! They suck." She half smiles and I say "You know you have a little dimple on your right cheek that shows when you smile real big or when you're laughing really hard. I've always thought it was cute." She smiles widely and says "You're so sweet, Conrad. You always are." I reply "You're so beautiful, you know that right? Those people suck for trying to make you think otherwise." She asks "Is that why you keep staring at me?" I answer "Oh sorry what was that? I keep getting lost in your eyes. What? Too cheesy?" She laughs and playfully slaps me.

After our walk, we get back to the house where Jeremiah reminds me of the party tonight. Y/N agrees and Jeremiah stares at our hands still intertwined. I can't help that I like holding her hand. Y/N doesn't drop my hand either, so she must like me, right?

Y/N changes and says "I just remembered that I don't even have my whole suitcase here. I think I forgot to bring clothes, except one swimsuit." I ask "Do you need a shirt? I have several. I have the perfect shirt for you tonight. Let me find it." I find it and say "Ok, here it is and you should totally wear it. I'm not saying you shouldn't, but you should." She bursts out laughing and says "Oh I'm for sure wearing this." She changes and I smile widely. I love her in my clothes. What's best about this shirt is that it says FISHER on the back in big letters with my old number from football and on the front is this cheesy photo of me playing football at age 5. My mom had them made when I was in high school.

Y/N walks out in my shirt and it looks good on her. I exclaim "I just realized this will make it look like you're my girlfriend or that we're dating." She smirks and asks "Is that a bad thing? Is there someone else in your life that should wear this instead?" I answer "No and no. There's only you. What about you? Is there uh... someone in your life romantically?" She answers "There is no one but you." I ask "May I take you on a date this week?" She answers "Yes."

Jeremiah walks in, glances between us, and exclaims "We're leaving for the party if you two want to leave when we leave. Y/N, I like your shirt."

We all leave for the party. I drive Y/N and me to the party because Steven, Taylor, Belly, and Jeremiah are in the other car.

We get drinks and I walk around with Y/N a lot. We part ways and she goes off to Belly and Taylor. Jeremiah and Steven stop me when I move to get another drink. Jeremiah asks "What happened with Y/N? She's wearing your shirt. You never let anyone wear your clothes." Steven asks "Did you guys kiss yet?" I answer "We're going on a date this week. We did not kiss." Steven claps me on the back and says "I'm proud of you man. Get your girl!" I ask "What about Taylor?" Steven laughs and walks off. Jeremiah says "I'm happy for you, Conrad. Truly. You and Y/N deserve to be together." I smile.

I take a look at Y/N smiling with friends and I want to hug her, so I sneak behind her and wrap my arms around her waist. I put my head on her shoulder and kiss her on the cheek.

I exclaim "I missed you and I needed to hug you." Y/N replies "I like your hugs. Oh did you know that we're only going to be one hour from each other next year? We can visit each other when we're free on the weekend." I kiss her on the cheek and reply "I did know that. I'm so excited about it and yes, I will be seeing you a lot. I need my Y/N fix." She replies "I think our friends are sick of us." I laugh and ask "And why do you think that?" She answers "Well... you know what? I'm happy with you and your attention, so it does not matter to me what they think." I kiss her on the side of her mouth and say "I'm really happy too. I like you so much. You have no idea." She flips around in my arms and asks "How much?" I kiss her on the lips and she says "You must like me a lot." I ask "And how much do you like me?" She pulls my head back down and deepens the kiss as her hands go into my hair. So she likes me A LOT!

[infinitywrites]

I Didn't Expect You Part 4 ~ Conrad Fisher

(Part 3) (Masterlist) (Part 5)

gif credit @laurens-german

synopsis: Y/N never expected it to be the summer that everything changed. Conrad, Belly and Steven were all dealing with the consequences of recent break ups while Jeremiah's wasn't acting like himself. Susannah was undergoing treatment that provided unpredictable health results and kept her loved ones on the edge of tragedy. Had they drained the well of the magic of Cousin's beach? Or could something new fulfil it again?

warnings: multichapter slow burn, warnings will update with every chapter, timeline is both POST S2 and a retelling of S2 with changes, everyone swears A LOT, 4th of July party, ANGST between Jeremiah/Conrad, ANGST between Conrad/Y/N, Nicole (sorry to this Queen), Conrad's friend Danny (made him into my own thing), hints of Belly/Jeremiah, I don't know shit about sports

word count: 4,141

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I feel like no one wants me

And I hate the way I'm perceived

I only have two real friends

'Cause I love people I don't like

All I did was try my best

Ego crush is so severe

God, it's brutal out here

Got a broken ego, broken heart

I decided I needed sustenance before heading into the lion's den and popped a bacon wrapped scallop in my mouth. Nicole sidled up next to me in no time, refilling her plate.

"Someone's got game." Her voice was low, unassuming and her eyes were focused on the desserts when I looked at her.

I almost spit out my margarita, "You're kidding, right?"

She giggled, "Nuh uh. I got to watch you in action twice now. Danny was eating out of the palm of your hand and even Cam looked weak."

"OhmiGod, Cam is Belly's ex!"

Nicole shrugged, "Okay, fair but I don't blame you for Danny cause he's definitely been working out." Our eyeline shifted to where he was laughing with Jeremiah and Steven.

"He's at school for a baseball scholarship, of course he works out." Her look of unabashed thirst would never not amuse me.

"Fuck, that's so hot." She looked like she was about to swallow her tongue.

Without another word Nicole walked off in his direction and I smiled as I watched her get her flirt game on and trail her fingers up his bicep. My mind drifted back to the house as I downed the last of my margarita before I headed inside to poke the bear.

He was in the kitchen, drinking from a dark liquor bottle when I walked in. His sullen eyes met mine for a long moment, "Where's your boyfriend?" 

"Would you shut the fuck up for like a second?" The words were out of my mouth before I could stop them as I leaned against the island on my palms. Conrad rolled his eyes and turned his body away from me. That set me off again, "Since when the fuck do you talk so much anyway? My god the stupid fucking shit that flies–" 

He put his bottle down, "Since when the fuck so you swear so much?" It was disconcerting how much calmer he was than me. It spurred me on.

"Since you, asshole!" I didn't even realize how angry I was until the words came flying out and the adrenaline spiked higher. "Since you make me so fucking mad I wanna tear my own hair out! And I thought we made progress the other night. How fucking stupid am I?" I took a long breath and felt the heat prickle my cheeks. I should have brought in another frozen margarita.

The look on Conrad's face changed and his voice went soft, "You've never been stupid a day in your life." 

"Fuck you, I'm not done!" I wasn't done being pissed at him for trying to ruin a perfectly good day. "Do you even know who asked me to come in after you? Your friend, Danny. Sweet Danny who was genuinely worried that he hurt your feelings, you fucking–" 

His eyes narrowed cruelly, "Oh, poor sweet Danny who wrangled an invitation to 4th party just to drool all over you apparently." 

"Are you seriously fucking jealous right now?"

Conrad's mouth snapped shut as his eyes widened in panic for a second and I couldn't have cared less, "I didn't want to steal his attention away from you, Conrad. I was just saying hi…you know, like a nice person." 

"Mhm. I'm sure he's got lots of ideas of how you can be nice to him." He took another swig from his bottle.

I couldn't even look at him anymore so I squeezed my eyes shut until I could. "Jesus, I'm not gonna date your friend, okay?!? Not if really you don't want me to." 

When I opened my eyes Conrad looked shocked, "What? Seriously?"

It was the last thing I was expecting and I could feel myself start to calm down finally, "I mean, yeah. If it bugs you that much." 

I could tell he was thinking about it. "Y/N…" 

"Unless it really was the stupid fucking baseball shit." It was the shift in his tone of voice. I couldn't handle it.

Conrad paused, "I mean, he is a fucking liar. It's…" I spluttered a laugh and couldn't even hear his very important correction. "What? It's true." Conrad shrugged miserably and placed his bottle back on the counter.

I thought about Danny's request when I said, "I'm sure it is. I just have no idea what you're talking about."

Conrad rolled his eyes and I sighed.

"How is it I've known you my whole life and I never knew the absolute stats nerd hidden under that 90s heartthrob hair?" The second I walked into that kitchen I could barely believe the words coming out of my mouth. I was cutting myself off from another margarita even though I wanted it.

"You think I'm a 90s heartthrob?" He was leaning on the other side of the island and peering at me quizzically. I thought I could even see the hint of smirk under his misery.

"Ohmigod, that's what you got from that?" My face was screwed up in disbelief. His ego had no bounds.

"Uh, that was definitely the most important part." 

"Oh so you're a delusional nerd too?" This was better than sulking Conrad or angry Conrad but only by an inch.

He paused and shrugged like he was shaking off the rest of his sour mood. And then I felt him focus his stare directly at me in a way I'd never experienced. I didn't have to look up at him to know what I'd find. Was this the shameless confidence that Belly always talked about? The silence was bad enough. He always did that; said the thing I least expected or never said anything at all after I did. He'd just wait and look at me, expectantly until I felt like I couldn't breathe.

The silence was never comfortable so I mustered the last bits of my courage and looked him square in the face, "Not everyone is flirting with you, Conrad." 

His smile grew for the first time since he thought he was on a winning streak in the pool. The unsettling thing about it was it seemed like he knew something I didn't. Conrad was nodding and considering the statement as he stepped around the island to stand in front of me on the other side. 

I gasped softly when his eyes flashed back to mine and muttered, "You sure?" He lingered in the moment and I felt a calloused fingertip graze the back on my hand gripping the island countertop. Just when the static in my brain started the clear and I could breathe again, Conrad leaned into my ear to whisper, 

"Or do you save that for Danny now?" 

He stayed close but he had to be drunker than I thought and fucking with me again so I took a breath and tried not to take the bait. Maybe it was my turn to say the thing he least expected for once. I didn't want to have to look him in the eye again after that, "I…you know, sometimes I can't tell and it's unintentional. Danny probably did the same thing. He's just a nice guy." 

He scoffed and took a step back. "Sure. Not like you'd notice either way."

I looked at him then and shook my head in confusion, "What is that supposed to mean?" 

Conrad opened his mouth as he stepped closer again but was shocked into place when he heard his brother calling for him from the other room. "Connie!"

He had the decency to look at me apologetically before directing him to the kitchen. When I saw Jeremiah's expression was serious and fixed on Conrad, I used that opportunity to make my exit. I took a few minutes in the bathroom to splash some water on my face and assess the pink hue in my skin as flush or sunburn. It didn't take long before I started to hear raised voices. I debated whether to investigate or leave them to it, if it was even the Fisher brothers at all, but when I thought about how Susannah wouldn't be able to deal with it like she always did, I knew I had to make sure it wouldn't get out of hand.

I caught pieces of the story as I walked back towards the kitchen. Susannah and Adam had been separated for a year now but he'd helped throughout as he should. He helped more than he did when they were together if Conrad was telling the truth. I heard Jeremiah accuse Conrad of scaring Adam away from the party altogether. It was true, Adam Fisher was nowhere to be found for the first time since I could remember. It was strange to think about now when he'd showed up for a few short hours the year before.

Jeremiah's tone was firm. "What gave you the right?" 

"Get over it, Jere. They're not even together anymore." In contrast, Conrad sounded like this was the last conversation he wanted to have.

"You think I don't know that?" 

"This is Mom's house and her party. You really think she wants him here?" 

"I think she wanted him at Thanksgiving and Christmas and when the treatment got really bad in the Spring too. Oh, but that's right you had finals and weren't around much then, moping around after you screwed things up with Belly." My eyes squeezed shut at the dig. This could escalate badly.

"Fuck you, you know I came home every second I could!" 

"I was there every day!" 

"Okay?! Okay! What do you want, a medal?" I hoped the breath I huffed wasn't audible enough for them to hear.

Jeremiah shook his head out of the corner of my eye, "Did you even ask her? Cause you're right, this is her party and she should have decided. Not you." The footsteps were heavy across the tile as he left and I heard the door slam behind him. 

Conrad sighed. "You heard every word of that, didn't you?" 

I winced and came out of hiding around the corner to see him leaning heavy on the island like it was the only thing holding him up at this point. His liquor bottle of choice was abandoned by the sink. "I'm sorry...but not every word and I didn't mean to, I swear. I was just in the bathroom." 

"It's okay. It's not your fault. Actually it's my fault. As per usual." He didn't move from his spot as his eyes carved holes into the countertop.

"Don't say that." My heart ached for him without my permission. Maybe Conrad fucked up by not inviting Adam or telling him not to show up at all but some of what Jeremiah said was unfair. And it wasn't hard to see that his brother was taking every word to heart no matter what.

"Why not? It's true. It's the only fucking thing I'm good at anymore." He looked up finally, lost.

"Connie, come on." 

The words seemed to shock him out of his emotional spiral. His brows raised and while the smile on his face was immediate, it fell just as quick, "I can't remember the last time you called me Connie." 

"I think I do, actually." Apparently it was infectious because now I was smiling at a memory I thought I'd lost.

When I looked his way again, he was watching me expectantly with the hint of that same sweet smile on his face. It was the least I could do since he seemed interested in the distraction from his own thoughts.

"There was this girl in my freshman year named Connie and I remember thinking it was hilarious that it was a girl's name. Kinda gross of me, honestly." 

"I would say," he interrupted but was still listening. 

"Do you wanna hear the story or not?" His hands raised in defeat as he chuckled. "I told Belly I was gonna torture you with it that summer; calling you every famous Connie I could come up with. TV characters and political figures but she got really upset and said you'd be mad so 'please don't'. So I tried to forget about it entirely so I wasn't tempted." 

When I looked up again, Conrad was looking at me with an expression I couldn't quite figure out so I kept on. "And it must have worked too because I forgot about it until this second." 

He nodded slowly, "Does that mean I get to call you Y/N/N again?" 

I rolled my eyes at the old nickname and conceded, "I guess it's only fair." 

We ended up heading back towards the party and paused to look outside sliding door windows at the view of the patio. He nudged me, "So you've grown to like my name." 

I didn't need to look at him to know he was trying to shift his mood before we went back to everyone who was oblivious about what had gone down inside. "Damn, the confidence with which you said that completely inaccurate statement."

"Mm, say it again." He muttered and I shot him a glare so fast I couldn't believe he kept talking. "But softer."

My patience was battling against the need for physical violence but I let it out verbally. "Maybe try therapy if that gives you a nerdgasm." I was gonna get a lot of traction out of this nerd thing.

"Exposure therapy maybe." The mood shift was successful if I could base it on his teasing tone and goofy smile.

"I said I wasn't flirting with you, dummy." I didn't mean to bring it up again since it wasn't that serious but it wasn't the only thing I'd said that I was gonna regret after the fact.

Conrad scrunched his face in disbelief, "That's definitely not what you said. Actually, we decided you wouldn't know if someone was flirting with you. Case in point." 

I could barely listen to him anymore and I gestured for him to quit it. "Fine, whatever, I'm saying it now. Not flirting. Can we move on?" I knew he was looking at me then but I refused to do the same.

"No." His response was immediate and I saw him register the shock, like it even surprised him a little that he'd said it. 

I didn't have a choice then and could only gape in his direction, eyes struck wide by his stubborn streak. 

Conrad turned to me and stepped closer like he'd made a decision. "Even if you weren't, I was. And I want you to know so I'm telling you now, straight up, to your face, so later you can't explain it away or pretend I didn't…flirt with you." 

And that's when I realized he did know something I didn't. I was such an idiot. He broke his steady gaze for a second and chuckled, "I didn't mean to at first and then…I don't think I can stop now." 

If all that wasn't enough, he wasn't done. "I don't want to." Conrad leant close then and his voice dropped an octave, "I mean, why does he get to when I can't?"

I heard the sliding door shift open and closed but didn't see it from my frozen state, staring at a corner piece of the door frame. I sucked in an unsteady breath and looked up just in time to see him look back at me from the edge of the pool, quickly before he jumped in.

My nerves were shot and despite the cool air inside the house compared to the heavy July sun, my hairline was damp. My mind was blank and racing at the same time; no thought coherent in the slightest so I shut it down completely. No more thinking, not that I could think myself out of this one anyway. I waited until I could breathe normally and wasn't overheating from the inside before I stepped back out to the patio and steered directly to the drinks table for my third frozen margarita.

The rest of the party was fairly uneventful in comparison but still great. No more drunken drama or broken family heirlooms to Belly's great relief. In fact, I found a lot of peace watching her for the rest of the night; giggling with her friends, swimming until her limbs cramped up and flirting with Jeremiah if I could read the signals right. He seemed elated by the development and I let myself be happy for them instead of diving into the complications of that potential. No more thinking. 

At one point, I watched Conrad grab Danny's shoulder, both of them nursing their last beers of the night, and mutter something to him that looked serious enough to be an apology. Danny shook his head with a smile and gripped him in a fierce hug. I didn't even realize I was smiling at the sight until Danny's eyes caught mine and he mouthed a grateful 'thank you'. It was so sweet I had to put down my margarita and rethink my life choices. I caught Aunt Laur and Susannah sitting together and seeing it too: Laurel pouted her bottom lip at her friend and Susannah's eyes sparkled with unshed tears.

When the party got to the point of only relying on the patio and pool lights, I distracted myself with the first steps of organized clean up. Steven joined me not long after, saying that he needed an excuse for a quiet task to keep his hands busy. Usually I would have pressed for more information but I was surviving off fumes by that point. Maybe everyone was. Nicole and Danny stopped by to say goodbye and thanked us for a great party. I hugged them both and looked around to realize that it was only the family left after that. Jeremiah and Belly said something about how they'd make up for their clean up crew shift in the morning and were nowhere to be found after that.

Eventually, when Susannah's porcelain serving platter almost slipped from my hands and into pieces on the kitchen floor, Laurel told me I'd done enough and shooed me upstairs. I debated washing the day off before I crashed into bed but worried I'd actually fall asleep under the warm spray. I'd just managed to get into a baggy Cousin's Rowing t-shirt and sleep shorts before I drifted off into a dreamless sleep.

It was the creak of the old wooden drawers of Belly's dresser that pulled me out of deep slumber. The room was bright with sunlight shining through the curtains and I had slept right on anyway. I yawned as Belly made a face in my direction and grabbed her crop top.

"I'm sorry! I was just gonna change before I got to the beach. I don't wanna miss the chance on our last day." 

"What time is it?" I looked around the room when my phone wasn't on my nightstand like usual. It landed on the end of my bed with a thump.

"After 10. Here. I found it on the kitchen table when I came in last night. Figured I should plug it in for you."

I smiled and saw that it was, indeed, fully charged. "You're sweet."

"The least I could do. You barely left anything for me and Jere to finish up this morning."

"Yeah, I was on a mission." I looked at her smiley face as she pulled her top over her bikini. "So. About you and Jere…"

Belly was never good at hiding things from me and her face screamed guilt even as she tried to shrug it off. "What do you mean?"

"Belly. Come on." She looked at me then, waiting. "You guys hung out all day yesterday and then you left together last night. What's going on there?"

The poor thing looked scared, "You're not mad?"

I rolled my eyes, "Is there something to be mad about? I mean, if you guys like each other…it's not gonna be easy but there are worse things."

"Wow, you should sleep in more often. Oh, don't forget to check the kitchen when you get up. Conrad went out early and got the good muffins."

"Oh, nice. But you're not off the hook about this Jere thing."

She pulled her lip balm out of her pocket and smeared it across her bottom lip. "It's not anything yet. When there's something to tell, I'll let you know."

"You better."

I took a moment to check my phone and saw an unread message from an unknown number. Hey, it's Danny. Jeremiah swore it was cool if he gave me your number so I hope that's okay. It was nice seeing you yesterday. The look on my face must have given me away because Belly was laughing at my expense in almost no time.

"Let me guess. Danny decided to text you after all." She wiggled her brows and giggled.

"Did you know about this?"

"I was there when Jere was trying to convince him. Poor guy actually thought you rejected him because of Conrad." Belly didn't seem to notice if my face reacted to that tidbit. "I told him there wasn't any reason you couldn't come back to Cousin's this summer if you had some good incentive."

She wasn't wrong. It wasn't like I had plans like Steven and Belly. I didn't need to be anywhere until the middle of August. I didn't need to shut everything down before it even started; before giving it a chance to be something to forget about at all. It was a nice thought that was almost immediately ruined by Conrad's look of relief when I told him I'd do the exact opposite. Maybe in a different world where I wasn't leaving for California in five weeks, or if I had any concrete plans of spending more time in Cousin's this summer, I'd feel different. Not to mention that I still didn't have the slightest idea where Conrad's head was at after yesterday and I wasn't sure I even wanted to. The world in which I could be excited about this didn't exist and it was time to make peace with that. 

"You know he invited me to his ball game? I can't believe I have to leave before seeing him in those white pants." 

"Y/N!" Belly threw her stuffed polar bear, Junior Mint, at my chest and I caught it with a laugh. "I knew you liked him. He got so much hotter this year, I'm a little jealous I didn't get there first." 

I gasped dramatically, "I'm telling Jeremiah!" 

"I'm kidding…kind of. I mean, I'm definitely leaving but Danny Wilder could inspire a hot girl summer." 

"Mm. Period." I looked back at the text and wondered if I should just leave it altogether. My stomach grumbled and it distracted me enough to leave it be for now and wave Belly off to the beach to have her fun.

I shuffled down the stairs to the kitchen after my shower, remembering the muffins Belly said would be waiting for me. The box was on the island like always and I smiled at the small victory. I really should have missed my chance at one, let alone my favourite, coming down after 11am. I opened the box and considered my choices when I heard someone clear their throat. I looked towards the sound and found Conrad standing in the doorway.

"Uh…I uh, saved you a carrot. It's under the cake plate." He gestured to the other side of the counter where it waited for me.

"Oh. Thanks." I walked that way and saw him shift his stance uncomfortably, and look down at his feet. I forced myself to give him the credit he deserved at that moment with a look of sincerity. "You didn't have to do that."

He looked pleasantly surprised, "It's no problem. You uh…call it a thanks for cleaning up last night. My mom really appreciated it."

"Of course. Anything for Susannah." 

It was the most polite we'd ever been to each other in our entire lives. I wasn't even sure it was real since there were no witnesses to prove I wasn't making the whole thing up somehow. Belly and Steven would laugh in my face if I told them. But that didn't stop the awkwardness from getting worse by the second and finally I couldn't take it anymore. Conrad looked like he wanted to say something else but I couldn't hear it, whatever it was and I was scared that I already knew. Instead of giving him the chance, I mumbled a quick 'thanks again' and 'see you later' before bolting back upstairs with my carrot muffin in hand and shut the door behind me. I leaned back against it and wondered how I'd avoid whatever that was for the next 24 hours before my time in Cousin's would come to an end.

Next

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author's note: I hope you enjoyed part 2 of 4th of July! How are we feeling at this point? Don't worry because there's still lots more story to come even if Y/N thinks her journey is ending. Next chapter is a day at the boardwalk! Thank you again for the continued support 💚💛🧡❤️. Reply with comments and let me know if you wanna be added to my taglist. If you'd like to ask me about any upcoming chapter warnings you wanna be warned of ahead of time (angst? 18+ smut?) then come visit my blog with any questions and I'll be happy to answer!

taglist: @c4rpediem-s @jackierose902109 @lcvecstiel @h0t-as-h3ll @stylesxroyalty @fandom-addict404 @hellofutur @junnniiieee07 @shelby-x @historygeekqueen

[dumblilb]

CHAPTER 2: SUMMER DRESS

Jeremiah fisher x fem!reader

(Summary: y/n and belly say yes to the deb invite and belly gets invited on her first date)

(Warnings: angst)

(Words: 2986)

* ・゚☆ 。・ * ・゚★ 。・ * ・゚☆ * ・゚☆ 。

“Who was that guy you were with at the bonfire?” I ask smirking at belly as she walks into my room. I’m sitting at the vanity getting ready for the day as she sits on the bed next to be.

“His name is cam.” She blushes.

“Do we like, like cam?” I push turning to her squinting my eyes.

“I- I don’t know? What about the was Jeremiah was being all flirty with you during the swim at the beach.”

“He was NOT!” I gasp.

“Yes he was.” she defends and I roll my eyes.

“Okay okay drop it. Let’s go eat. Plus have you decided on the deb stuff?” I say as we get up and head downstairs.

“Yeah I think I’m gonna do it.” She says and I smile.

“Me too. We can be all pretty in dresses together.” I squeal.

“Let’s tell Susannah.” She says and we go find her.

“Susannah, me and y/n are gonna do the deb thing.” Belly says.

“Oh, my God! Belly and y/n is gonna be a debutante.” Susannah says loudly for my mom and Laurel to hear. Causing everyone else to give their opinion as well.

“It's really not that big of a deal.” I say.

“I'm sorry. Like, Belly? Like, my sister? Like, that thing right there?” Steven says pointing at belly.

“Shut up, cretin.” Belly defends.

“Belly is smokin. You’re just jealous.” I say giving him a glare causing her to blush.

“Okay, this is gonna be so much fun. Just you wait. There is, uh... there's the tea, the auction, the ball, of course, the rehearsal. I got to write this down.” Susannah gasps. “We need to go shopping.”

“This sounds so fun!” My mom says coming up to me and fixing the hair around my face.

“This sounds... expensive.” Laurel says concerned.

“Oh, don't worry, Laur. It's on me. It was my idea after all, and we still need to style you for your book party, so...” Susannah says reassuring her. She places an arm around both our moms waists. They’re so cute.

“Belly, are you sure you want to do this? It doesn't seem very you.” Laurel asks making sure.

“It's not.” Conrad says and we all turn to him. Belly’s face drops.

“Conrad, could you please be a little more supportive? Now, which one of you is gonna be Belly's escort to the ball?” Susannah enquires.

“Not me. I went last year.” Conrad says.

“Yeah, and I swore off balls.” I wanted to laugh but I couldn’t help making a disappointed face at Jeres comment. But Steven laughed for me anyways.

“The dances, dude.” Jere says to him laughing back.

“Wow, guys. Stop fighting over us. Plus, I'm not going with either of you. I am going to find my own date. Wikipedia says debutante balls require instruction in morals and social etiquette.” She says giving appointed look to the boys. She rests her head on my shoulder.

“I'm going for a swim.” Conrad says leaving the room.

“She could use some etiquette.” Steven says and I throw a towel at him.

“Yeah. No offense, Beck, but I don't feel like a country club is the best place to teach the girls about morals.” Laurel says.

“Laur, times have changed. There's a girl debbing this season, and she's bringing her girlfriend as her escort, and the club was fine with it.” Susannah defends.

“Oh that’s great.” My mom says.

“How very progressive of them.” Laurel rolls her eyes.

“Here you are, girls.” Jere says and gives us some eggs he was cooking.

“Thanks jere.” I smile and he gives a soft one in return.

“Well, hurry up! We have shopping to do.” Susannah says.

“It's not like I was getting any work done anyway.” Laurel says with a chuckle.

“Come on laur it’ll be fun.” My mom says shaking her shoulders softly.

We finish up our food and head to the dress shop.

It was a long process but it was nice. It felt like old times. Being a little kid playing dress up. And the moms loved the fashion show.

We finally picked out are dresses and went home to get ready for an introduction tea time thing for the debs at the country club.

Laurel took us and she pulled belly aside as we got out of the car.

“Belly? I just want you to know that if you decide you hate it or if the girls are mean or even if the food is bad, you can text me. I promise I won't say "I told you so."” She says. I can tell she’s really worried for belly.

“I'll be fine.” She reassures.

“Humor me? Use our code phrase, and I'll be right there.”

“Mom.”

“You remember it from when you were little, right?”

“Lemon Jelly Belly.”

“Lemon Jelly Belly.Have fun.” She says. “Y/n take care of our girl okay.” Laurel says and I nod.

“Don’t worry laur. Nothing will happen.” And with that she drove off leaving us to walk in. As where walking I see Jeremiah so I run up to him waving my hand. Belly following suit.

“Hey. Jeremiah.”

“Oh, my God. Uh, Y/n, belly. Wow. I didn't even recognize you guys.” He says looking me up and down. The feeling of his eyes lingering driving me crazy.

“These fascinators are so goofy lookin.” I say messing with the mesh that’s hanging over my eyes.

“Tell me the truth. Um, do we look foolish?” Belly asks.

“Um... Uh, no, y-you guys look good. You look good.” He laughs. Reaching out to mess with the mesh himself.

“Um, let me walk you over.” He smiles.

“Hey y/n I need to use the restroom. I’ll meet you in there okay.” She says giving me a small wink.

“What?” I say turning to her with panicked eyes.

“Nothing. Uh, just go with Jeremiah.” She smiles.

“I- okay. Sure.” I say and turn to him with a grin and we start walking. Slow enough so belly could catch up.

“You know…They have strawberry, raspberry, raspberry type cookies. Oh, they're to die for.” He giggles changing the subject. Be he couldn’t last long before bringing the fascinator up again.

“Okay. I-I still never thought I'd see the day where you were wearing a fascinator.” He laughs.

“Oh really.” I say raising my eyebrows.

“You’ve always been beautiful.” He says and my heart skips a beat.

“But you never seemed like the deb type. You’ve got this reckless kinda beauty.” He muses messing with my hair. He smiles down at me. Softly. The skin on my cheeks felt hot. Jeremiah in all the years I’ve know him has been flirty. But he flirts with everyone. So it was nothing special when he did it with me. But this time it felt… more. The way he was looking at me. The way he spoke. I was probably psyching myself out. But I couldn’t help feeling flustered by his comments.

“Jeremiah.” A woman interrupts as belly meets up with us.

“Paige.” He responds.

“Where's your shirt?” She says annoyed.

“It's always a pleasure.” He grins sass in his voice.

“Mm-hmm.” She muses.

“This is Belly. I mean, uh, Isabel Conklin, and Y/n Rowe, the young women my mom told you about.” He says poking me in the side. I slap his hand away.

“They’re late.” She says.

“I-I-I'm so sorry.” Belly apologizes.

“You're at table two.” She says ignoring her.

“Are those those little Brie and fig jam sandwiches with the prosciutto?” Jere interrupts.

“Don't you dare. Okay. Those are for the girls.” She warns him walking away but he quickly grabs one from the table.

“Jeremiah, those are for the girls!”she complains.

“Just-just one. Knock 'em dead.” He says and dashes off.

“Oh, my God. That's the girl Conrad was kissing at the bonfire. And that's the girl Steven was with. Ugh. FML.” Belly whispers to me before we sit down.

“Hi.” We all say to each other quietly. I could tell the girls were scanning us down.

We all quickly introduced ourselves.

“Is that from the other night?” Shayla asks belly. Pointing to the bruise on her cheek.

“Yeah.”

“Here, let me fix it. I think we're good. Yeah?” She says taking out some concealer and applying it to her face. Shayla seemed nice.

“Thank you.” Belly smiles.

“I told my mom the only way I would do this is if I could bring my girlfriend, 'cause I thought it would be a deal killer, but the club has been surprisingly chill about the whole thing.” One girl says

“I'm honestly shocked.” Another girl says.

“Yeah. Literally, Dara, I was expecting a conversion camp to spring out of the bushes. No. Lesbians and debutantes are, like, a completely juxtaposing idea.”

“Opposites.”

“Yeah, but Cousins likes to pretend to be woke.”

“Mm-hmm. Trust me. My family deals with it constantly. The things we do for college applications. It's insane. Don't worry, Marisa. You'll get in everywhere. Wait. Where are you applying?” She says turning to another girl named Gigi.

“You know, the usual. Every Ivy minus Cornell. Mm-hmm. Ithaca is so bleak.”

“I know. What about you?” Shayla says turning to belly

“Oh, Belly's only a sophomore. Right? I think that's what Conrad told me.” Nichole interrupts.

“Yeah, I-I'll be a junior in the fall.” Belly responds.

“So, is this your first summer here in Cousins?” She asks us both.

“No, we’ve been coming here for our entire lives.” I say.

“Yeah, she's, like, family friends with Conrad and Jeremiah. Uh, so are you and Jeremiah, like, a-a thing, or are you gonna take him to the ball? Um...” Gigi ask me.

“Oh, my God, back off, Geeg.” Nichole says

“It was a question.”

“They're, like, basically related, okay?” Says Nichole.

“You have nothing to worry about.” I smile trying not to start anything.

“I'm not worried.” Gigi defends.

“Yeah, sure. Keep telling yourself that, babe. Gigi has had this thing for Jeremiah... Ever since he got abs?Pun intended. Absolutely.” She says but Gigi makes a face.

“Relax. I'm not into Jeremiah Fisher. Yeah, and you’re noticing his abs?” Gigi concerns.

“Ooh. No. She's too busy eye-fucking the waiter.” Another girl says. I turn and see Steven causing me and belly to make a face of disgust.

“Dude, that's Belly's brother.” Nichole says.

“Oh, my God. Really? Oh, that's gross.” Gigi says.

“So, what's it like to live with Jeremiah and Conrad?” She continues.

“Yeah. Conrad's so mysterious.”shayla says but we’re all cut off by Paige.

“Hello, debutantes. A few small housekeeping bits I'd like to go over. We have a lot to look forward to this season. Now, I understand some of you might think that debbing is outdated. It's something you're doing to appease your families. But the Cousins Debutante Ball is a part of history. Venerated, yet ever evolving, it's a tradition you'll someday pass on to your own daughters. It's a formal marking of this passage of time between your teenage years and your adulthood. One ends, and the other begins. It's a journey generations of women before you have taken. Women who you can learn from and who can inspire you.” She says catching our attention.

“Debs, at each table is a big sister who will guide you through the season. So, please introduce yourselves. “ she continues and we turn back to each other. Belly got Nichole and I got Shayla. I was excited but I felt a little bad for belly since Nichole was all over Conrad.

When it was all over I noticed belly talking to the Sam guy from the bonfire, cam. She says goodbye looking all giddy and walk over to me.

“What’s got you all happy.” I smile.

“I’ve got a date.” She says softly and my eyes widen.

“NO WAY! Bells I’m so happy for you.” I exclaim and we do a little happy dance before we get picked up by my mom.

“Hey girls.” She smiles rolling down the window.

“Hey Kate.” belly says climbing in the backseat as I get in the front.

“What’s got you girls so happy.” She says pulling away.

“Bells has a date.” I smile and she gasp.

“Aww, are baby’s all grown up.” She coos causing belly to laugh.

“Don’t be so dramatic.” Belly says.

When we get home me and belly talk about how excited she is. And a few hours later I help her get ready. When she heads downstairs I stay in my room digging through my cd’s looking for one to put on when Jere walks in a little while later.

“Hey we’re going to the drive in. Wanna come?” He asks and I squint my eyes.

“Isn’t that where belly’s date is.” I question. He just squints his eyes back at me. Making fun of my pout.

“It has no correlation, we’re just bored.” He says.

“Fine, but you boys better leave her alone. She not that much younger than us.” I say grabbing my boots and sliding them on.

“I promise.” He says and we go down getting everyone to pile in the car.

We actually watch the movie for a little bit but I can tell the guys are antsy. When Steven buys the car in drive I get nervous. He pulls up right next to them and I sigh.

“God you guys suck.” I say and get out of the car.

“Y/n come on. I’m sorry.” Jere wines.

“Why can’t you guys just leave her alone.”

“What the hell do you think you're doing?!” Belly says seeing the guys.

“Uh, just catching the end of our favorite movie.” Steven says.

“I mean... You have no right! You have to go!” Belly says annoyed.

“Guys come on let’s go.” I complain.

“Oh, Belly, relax. We-we were just joking around.” Steven says with a laugh.

“Steven, if you don't leave, I swear to God I will send everyone in this car your Dramione fanfic.” Belly says and he quickly shuts up.

“You wouldn't.”

“Oh, he spent an entire chapter talking about Draco's wand.”

“Bro.” Conrad says.

“Oh, my God. Steven, come on. You know, don't be embarrassed, man. Draco's hot.” Jere says and I slam my palm to my face. This is not the time.

“Drop it. Drop it. Hey, seriously?” Steven defends.

“Please leave.” She begs.

“All right, let's go, guys.” I say.

“What? Wait. What? Are you kidding me?” Steven says shocked.

“Steven, drive the car.” I say.

“You were the one who wanted to come, Conrad.” Steven continues.

“Just drive.” I yell and get back in the car.

“Drop me off at home I’m done for the night.” I say pissed off and the guys (besides Steven, who’s driving) look to me.

“Come on y/n, we’re sorry.” Jeremiah says and I glare at him.

“You promised we wouldn’t do that.” I say my voice cracking.

“What if she’s mad at me that I was there too. Did you think of that. I should have known you guys would have done this. She’s not a little girl anymore you can’t do this stuff.” I say getting emotional. I didn’t like to get that way in front of them. But I was mad but more at myself for trusting them and going.

“God I’m an idiot.” I sigh. “I wouldn’t have gone.” I say whiling my eyes getting glittery eyeshadow and mascara on my hand.

“Y/n I’m so sorry.” Jere says trying to put a hand on my leg to comfort me. But I just turn away towards the window.

“Just drop it for now.” I say. I just hope she isn’t mad at me.

When I get home I jump out of the car and rush inside trying to go to my room when the moms stop me.

“Baby what’s wrong?” My mom says.

“Nothing I’m just really tired.” I say and Susannah comes over.

“You can talk to us.” She says and Laurel nods.

“I’m just really worried belly’s gonna be upset with me.” I say and then explain to them what happened.

“Ugh I’m gonna kill those boys.” Susannah says.

“Your belly’s best friend y/n. And you stood up for her. She’ll understand.” Laurel says.

“You don’t have to hide this stuff from us.” My mom says and I rest my head on her shoulder.

“I love you guys.” I say and they all give me a group hug before I head upstairs to shower and get ready for bed.

Around and hour or two later I hear fighting downstairs. It was Conrad and belly. They were arguing. She quickly ran upstairs and saw me. I was about to start apologizing profusely when she jumps into my arms for a hug. Starting to cry.

“Bells it’s okay he’s just being a jerk.” I say.

“It just sucks you know. He’s being so different from last summer.” She says and we go to my room and lay down on the bed.

“Yeah I don’t know what’s wrong with him.” I say. It’s quiet for a second so I turn and look at her.

“Hey I’m really sorry about tonight. I wouldn’t have gone if they hadn’t promised me they wouldn’t do anything. I swear.” I say and she looks at me. And she gives a smile.

“I know. You would never do anything like that to me.” She says and pulls me in for a hug. Well… more like a cuddle. And we fell asleep talking about how she still had a good time with cam. It was nice to know her night wasn’t totally screwed up. It made me feel a lot better. But I was dreading the morning.

Cause Jeremiah fisher is relentless when he wants forgiveness.

[taylorsv3rsion13]

Jealous conrad x reader? Smut if you write it, if not just angst that's ends with fluff?

talk outside?

A/N : hi! sorry i don't write smut, but i'll write the angst and fluff LMAO. (i'm also so sorry, this is actually horrible)

synopsis : jealousy wasn't the best for conrad after seeing you and jeremiah.

words : 797

God, it's embarrassing, but I've liked Conrad since I was little.

"Jere, where's Conrad?" I asked him as we messed around in the pool with Steven and Belly.

He thought for a moment, "I'm not sure. Probably in his room though."

I sighed, getting out of the pool and grabbing a towel to dry myself off. Yeah, I'd just got to Cousins, but usually Conrad would be out here as well.

I walked up to his room and knocked. I heard a grunt before he opened the door.

"Hi." I said as I looked up to him. He was shirtless and his hair was everywhere.

"Hey." Was all he said before closing the door again.

"Please, please, please go to the party."" Belly begged as I was sprawled out on my bed.

"No, it's going to be lame." I groaned.

She laughed, "But Conrad will be there."

I rolled my eyes at her statement, "Yeah, but, Conrad will ignore me."

"Please Y/N." She begged yet again.

I sat up on my bed, raising an eyebrow, "Fine. But you owe me!"

I finished getting ready for the party, wearing a white eyelet top which tied in the front with a denim short skirt.

"Don't you look gorgeous." Susannah said to me as I made my way downstairs.

"Thank you, you look lovely as well, Susannah." I said, as I smiled.

"Okay, be safe and don't be dumb!" She called out as Belly and I left the house.

As soon as I walked in the smell of weed and alcohol hit me. Belly had run off somewhere and I was left by myself. Everyone was close in proximity with one another before I spotted Jeremiah.

"Y/N!" He exclaimed as he ran to hug me.

"Hi, Jere!" I said excitedly.

Jeremiah moved his hand to around my waist, "I'm glad to see that you could made it."

"So am I."

I could feel eyes on me as well though, and on the hand that was wrapped securely on my waist.

From across the room Conrad stood, staring straight at me.

I looked back at Jeremiah who's arm was still around me, but he was talking to a couple of other guys.

Someone had tapped my shoulder, as I turned around to be met with Conrad.

"Oh, hey." I said blankly.

"Hey, can we talk outside?" Conrad asked.

I scoffed, "I'm kinda busy right now."

Conrad grabbed me and picked me up, sending me over his shoulder.

"Put me down!" I protested, hitting his back.

"Stop making a scene, I just want to talk." Conrad said.

I sighed, allowing him to take me outside. He walked with me on his back til we got to his car.

"What the hell is wrong with you." I asked as he let me down.

"No, what the hell is with you? All of a sudden you're getting with my brother?"

"What the fuck are you talking about? And either way you're ignoring me. Why would you even care?"

"Y/N, I don't have to give you any reason." Conrad said, by now we were both shouting and our arms were flying in the air.

"But you really do because you're mad at me for no reas-"

His hands made their way to my cheeks and before I knew it, he had smashed our lips together.

He let go after a moment, "I'm sorry, I've been waiting to do that."

I just stared at him in shock.

"Y/N, say something so I don't look dumb right now. Please."

"I don't know what to fucking say, Conrad, you just kissed me after you've been mad at me since I got to Cousins."

"So do you like me or not, I can't keep acting like I hate you." Conrad explained.

"Okay yes I like you of course I do, who wouldn't? But so does every girl at Cousins!" I explained.

The house was quiet, everyone was asleep as I lay on my bed.

"Conrad, you're breathing so loud I can hear you from the other side of the door." I called out from inside my room.

He opened the door, coming in.

"Hey." He breathed.

"What do you need right now?"I asked.

"Y/N, can we just talk about us what we even are what happened, anything?" He asked.

"Are you trying to piss me off right now?" I asked.

Conrad laughed a little, "I wouldn't have to piss you off if you would just answer."

"I already told you how I felt."

Before I knew it our lips were intertwined yet again, but neither of us pulled away.

fuck i hated how he did this to me.

I pulled away, "Okay, I like you, and I'm willing to give it a try."

[villainousshakespeare]

In Praise of Tom Hiddleston and Female Directors

As a female director (albeit of Theater and not Film) I have been feeling a little frustrated once again as awards season brings no nominations for women. This led me (as many things do, lol) to thinking about my favorite Muse, Tom Hiddleston.

One of the things that I love about TH is willingness and enthusiasm to work with female directors, and on thinking about it I realized that this allyship has also benefited him as well. Case in point:

1. His first movie, Unrelated, was directed by Joanna Hogg. Now, of course all of us see Hiddles as the perfect Beautiful Boy but imagine if this movie had been directed by a man. In that case, Oakley, the handsome younger man who charms and tempts the 40 something woman, would almost certainly be cast with some young beef cake actor, or at very least had them bulk up in order to play the role. This is who male directors seem to think we desire. Instead, Hogg casts TH and boy does she sell him. Oakley is a little shit, but the way he is lit, framed, directed makes him all but irresistible. The female gaze sees all of his ethereal beauty and shares it with us.

2. Next we have my personal favorite, Henry V in The Hollow Crown. In his big leading episode, Tom is once again directed by a woman, Thea Sharrock. Again, look at how his is shot. The female gaze follows him riding in like a hero from our collective imagination in his opening shot. He is strong and dangerous, savage even at times, without ever loosing that thread of empathy that Henry struggles to clamp down. And do I even have to mention the proposal scene? Watch that and tell me it isn’t pure wish fulfillment for the majority of people who fancy men. I liked him when I watched Loki, but Hollow Crown made me fall so deep down the rabbit hole that I may never climb out again (and honestly, I’m okay with this).

3. Lastly, we come to the role that pushed him over the edge into superstardom, The Night Manager. Can there be any doubt that this miniseries was directed by a woman? The entire show was an advertisement for how gorgeous he is. Yes, there are some lovely shots of Elizabeth Debicki in various states of undress, but Pine is the major eye candy here. See him in finely tailored suits, see him astride a motorcycle, see him bathing, both in a waterfall and in a shower covered in mud, see his much lauded English countryside looking all round and pert... it just goes on and on. It is not just the visual that Susana Biers gets either. Unlike other spies of film and television, Jonathan is emotional, chivalrous, and above all intelligent. Tom nails the role and the world loved him for it.

I am not saying that male directors do not make Tom look good (hello Conrad’s arms) or play to his strengths (see the psychological beauty of Adam). I just believe there is something to be said for the qualities that female directors can bring out. 

In short (ha, sorry, this ran on looooong, lol) Tom trusts women directors more than many of his fellow actors, and I think the results are that he shows a vulnerability in his work that helps make him more than just another action star. Women have helped make him the actor he is today, and I don’t believe the fact that his last two directors were women is an accident. He said in his interview for Leading Lady Parts that he needed to work with more directors (he had worked with five at that point I believe) and he has been as good as his word. Another reason to love this man.

* I also want to make a special shout out to stage director Josey Rourke, who has the career that I want and gave us this amazing contribution:

[pasdasin]

Entaglement ch 6

levi x reader

summary: we really gonna have to get this guy! damn

cw: brief mention of almost sa, cursing, violence, levi 💀

an: sorry for the late update school is going crazy !

read under the cut

previous — next

The walk to work felt different. The usual mundane task felt more exciting, more how it used to feel. It felt like a lifetime since these feelings had entered your body and for the first time since learning of his death being fake, you felt something for him besides hate or grief. As you entered the building you called work, the atmosphere felt tense. Having to act as though everything was normal, you walked to your boss’s office and knocked. Soon after Conrad had opened the door and inside stood Titus O’lare.

He was a tall, lanky man. His hair was pushed back under his hat. His mouth had a long scar that crossed it diagonally and a cigarette between his lips. You entered the room and sat in your desk silently. The two men continued their discussion before your boss decided it was time.

“Y/n here is my best girl, pure.” Titus looked over in intrigue. “As a thank you for being such a good ally to my business, she offered to give you her virginity.” You stood up from your desk and walked over to the man.

“Please sir let me take you to my room,” you grabbed his hand and walked towards the master suite. With the two of you inside, he quickly started to kiss you and desperately started to remove his own clothes.

You had started to remove your own when you caught the glimpse of Levi and his squad outside the window. A slow dread as you realized what was coming next filled your body as you tried your best to please the man in front of you. You slightly spread your legs as he inspected you to make sure that Conrad was telling the truth.

“A virgin all for me, thank the walls.” He started to lift up your skirt when you mumbled something. He slapped your face in response “What was that you whore?”

“I’m sorry for whats about to happen,” before he could question you, Levi busted in through the window and tackled the man to the ground, beating the guy up for touching you. The rest of his squad piled into the room as Levi continued to pluverize the man.

“Levi stop,” you said holding his arm back from the next punch. Levi grunted and stood up, admiring his work.

“Jean, Connie get this guy back to the base,” Levi said before turning to you. “Are you okay? C’mon lets go.” Before you could protest, he carried you back to your home.

---

Levi had tortured the guy so much yet absolutely zero information was revealed about the boxes or the letters. In the basement, now turned torture room, was Hange and Erwin. Levi put down the rusty pliers and called in some of his squad to help clean up the mess, while the guy started taunting them.

“She’s mine you know, offered her virginity to me. That makes her my property.” Titus snickered staring at Levi, who was about to exit the room. Levi, without even thinking, turned to face the guy.

“She isn’t even a virgin, you know how I know that? Because I’m the one who claimed it.” His gaze hardened and he exited to room. Everyone else was left in shock. Levi quickly found you in your room, tears spilling over your eyes.

“What’s wrong y/n”

“You cost me my job, my life down here. Conrad definitely knows now. You know why I was working there? Because of our mothers debt. He was your mother’s pimp and my own. Now he is mine. I am a dead man because of you.” You clenched your fist. Levi reached out to touch you but was interrupted by a loud bang. You stared at him wide eyed as you felt your stomach. Your hand was covered in blood.

“Levi?” you asked before the world turned dark.

[heyyyitsmegia]

Anonymous this is for you!

AS TO YOUR LAME ASS EXCUSES YOU MADE UP FOR EVERY SINGLE CON I MENTIONED OF CONRAD'S:

He didn't have to be petty. Jeremiah didn't act like that. Yes, he yelled. But when you think that the girl you like actually liked you back because she spent her summer kissing you... you would be mad too at least I would. Conrad's actions were inexcusable in this case.

I guess we will see won't we?

Here you go bringing up Jeremiah's hook up count (You're just like Conrad, aren't you?)

If she didn't want anyone to know about her cancer... then why did Conrad know? Make it make sense when you are trying to argue with someone who can show receipts/evidence.

At least Jere said something to her and didn't call her a "Brat."

He was basically trying to make Belly feel insecure.

Still. He said it and it obviously hurt Belly.

Nope. That is strictly Jeremiah's thing.

I cannot agree with this (like I agree with anything you are saying) but his tone was mocking and belittling.

I would have liked him to say... "Belly. I'm sorry for everything I put you through. Jeremiah is the better choice."

Jeremiah's "wattpad lines" (so you say) were way better than Conrad's lines. At least Belly didn't shut Jeremiah down. Ijbol.

Wow. Really good point *says sarcastically*. His remarks visibly upset Belly and Jeremiah and he was being petty (like always).

So did Jeremiah. But the difference is Jeremiah knows what he wants and doesn't take it back when he feels like it.

Why would a girl show up in Conrad's dorm and ask if she left her sweater there? (mind you she goes to brown so it would makes sense for it to be a brown sweater) And why wasn't it found? And why would Conrad conveniently have one in Belly's size (mind you the girl and belly looked the same size) and we cannot forget the whiteboard outside on the door (the kiss and 'call me'). They definitely had a thing going on.

Haha. The fact that you said Adam should have been helping made me burst out laughing because when has the boys ever been able to rely on their dad?

Yeah. But he still wasn't over it. During their flat tire fight when Belly said… "I mean, you were seeing other people. We thought you were over it." He said to Belly... "Because otherwise, I was that pathetic loser that was keeping you guys apart." NOT OVER IT!

Nope. Conrad unquestionably criticizes Jeremiah. Criticize can mean... "form and express a sophisticated judgment of" and judgment means... "is an opinion that you have or express after thinking carefully about something." Which Conrad did during the whole car ride. Ex: 'Finch is fun', exposing Jeremiah's hookup count.

Wow. So what you are trying to say is... Jeremiah can't get mad Like, Conrad is the only one who can act like a dick? Hmm. Noted.

Yeah you are so right. So stop using Jeremiah punched Conrad as one of Jeremiah's flaws. Okay!

I'm honestly so glad you said this because, if you are excusing Conrad's actions and how he reacted to the kiss then I can excuse how Jeremiah acted when he found out Conrad and Belly kissed. So thank you for saying this.

What you said didn't relate to what I said at all. I said... "he makes Belly feel insecure" and yet you started talking about how he was a good bf until the prom and then proceeding to call out Jeremiah. Here are some examples of him making Belly feel insecure: "I liked you better with glasses." "Why don't you go look in the mirror some more." "Stop being such a baby!"

This is not your fault... it was the way I worded it. But, I was talking about how in book 3, every time he would see Belly and Jeremiah together (being romantic) he would leave (like a cry baby).

Firstly, I am referring to the books and show in this list. Secondly, he literally took Belly by the shoulders and was shaking her.

You are so funny I literally can't. You said Jeremiah doesn't apologize? Wow. Are we watching the same show because he literally apologized to Belly. And like I said Conrad doesn't take blame for his actions. Ex: "Grow up." Every time someone calls him out on his shit he says this.

Not making fun of his looks. Was making fun of the face he was making.

Ok. So is Jeremiah but you don't see him dictating the mood of everyone around him.

"And?"... And he's lazy.

Again, talking about both the books and show. Him showing off Nicole was immature on his part. But that's nothing new to him. LOL.

You know what, I take back what I said. Conrad is not dumb. Because, you cannot sit there and tell me that a Stanford bound student of his intelligence level could not see the sexual tension building up between Jeremiah and Belly. And as for the firework incident... no one got hurt. Yeah it was wrong. But, everyone made it out alive. Also he was mad because he loves Belly and he thought she loved him and then she goes and kisses Conrad. Of course he was angry. So was Conrad. Make it make sense babes.

Very cringe. Haha. Who has a plan for pursuing someone these days? It's literally 2023. Crazy that him and Steven see Belly as a plan. If you think about it, it kinda sounds like he's trying to win Belly. Y'know because that's what you bonrad girlies are always saying Jeremiah is trying to do. Ctfu.

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[bechloeislegit]

25 Days of BeChloe Christmases 2022

Day 14 - The Christmas Fix-Up

Prompt from FanFiction User Lexi (Guest): Can you please do one where Beca and Chloe are best friends in elementary-middle school, and years later, they reunite at both their best friends' (Stacie and Aubrey) Christmas party?

Beca Mitchell met her best friend, Stacie Conrad, for lunch. Beca had barely sat down when Stacie brought up the Christmas Eve party she and her girlfriend were having.

"Come on, Beca," Stacie begged. "You have to come. Brey's got a friend she wants you to meet. She thinks you two would be perfect for each other."

"I don't know, Stacie," Beca said. "You know I hate blind dates. Especially blind dates at parties."

"It's a month away," Stacie said. "Just promise me you'll think about it."

"Fine," Beca said. "I promise I'll think about it."

"Good," Stacie said. "I'll let Brey know you'll be there."

"What? No, that's not what I said," Beca said.

"Give it up, Beca," Stacie said, smirking. "You and I both know you'll be there."

"You think you know me, but you don't," Beca said, looking at her menu.

"I do know you, Beca," Stacie said. "I know that you'll say yes because you really want to see what kind of girl Aubrey thinks is your type. I've met her, and believe me, she is definitely someone you would go for."

Beca hated the smug smile on Stacie's face and just looked at Stacie without saying anything. Stacie raised an eyebrow and continued to stare at Beca.

"Fine," Beca said, finally giving in. "I'll be there. Just let me know if there is anything you guys want me to bring."

"Brey's doing all the organizing," Stacie said. "I'll let you know what she says."

"Okay," Beca said, looking around. "Where's our waitress? I'm starving."

~~ 25 Days of BeChloe Christmases 2022 ~~

Three weeks later, Stacie walks into Beca's office and sits across from Beca.

"Is there something I can do for you, Conrad?"

"Brey wants to know if you would mind bringing some wine to the party."

"I can do that," Beca said. "Should I bring red or white?"

"How about both?" Stacie asked.

"Okay," Beca said. "Is that it?"

"Aubry and I are excited about you meeting her friend," Stacie sing-songed.

"Oh, right, Aubrey's friend," Beca sighed. "Tell me something about her."

"I can't," Stacie said. "I promised Brey I wouldn't tell you anything about her. You'll just have to come to the party and see her for yourself."

"Did Aubrey tell her anything about me?" Beca asked.

"No," Stacie replied. "She wants you two to meet without any preconceived notions about the other."

"Come on, Stacie," Beca whined. "You're supposed to be my best friend. Just tell me something about her."

"I am your best friend, and I love you," Stacie said. "But I love my girlfriend more, and if she says not to tell you anything about this girl, I'm not telling you anything about this girl."

"Whipped," Beca said, chuckling.

"That may be, but at least I'm getting laid on the regular," Stacie said smugly.

"Okay, we're done here," Beca said, turning to her computer. "I don't want to hear about your sex life or delve into the absence of mine."

"I'm sorry, Beca," Stacie said. "But I promised Aubrey I wouldn't tell you anything."

"I get it," Beca said. "But it's not like you've never broken a promise before."

"Want to grab lunch?" Stacie asked, changing the subject. "My treat."

"Can we go to Antionio's?" Beca asked, side-eying Stacie.

"Sure," Stacie said, smiling.

"Let's go then," Beca said, standing. "I'm starving."

"You're always starving," Stacie said as they made their way out of Beca's office.

~~ 25 Days of BeChloe Christmases 2022 ~~

It was Christmas Eve, and Beca was putting the finishing touches on her makeup. She checked herself one last time in the mirror.

"I guess I'm ready," Beca said.

She sighed and grabbed her purse, throwing in her phone and wallet. She picked up the bag of gifts and the wine and left her apartment.

Beca entered Stacie's house behind a small group and looked around. There were a lot of people, and Beca had to zig-zag her way over to leave her gifts under the tree. She didn't know where to put the wine, so she looked around for Stacie.

"Beca!" Stacie yelled, hugging her. "You finally made it."

"Here's the wine," Beca said, handing the bag to Stacie. "I didn't know where to put it."

"Come with me," Stacie said. "We'll get you a drink and then find Brey."

Beca followed Stacie through the crowd to the kitchen. Beca poured herself a drink.

"Let's find Brey so you can meet your date," Stacie said.

As they left the kitchen, Beca was surprised as it seemed the crowd had grown.

"Oh, there's Brey," Stacie said, pointing her out through an opening that appeared in the crowd.

Beca's eyes widened, and her lips broke into a smile when she saw the woman standing next to Aubrey.

"She's my date?" Beca asked, pointing to the woman.

"Yep," Stacie said, smiling at Beca's reaction. "Chloe?"

Hearing her name, the woman turned to see who had said it. Her mouth dropped open, and her eyes grew wide in surprise.

"Beca!" Chloe squealed and rushed over, pulling Beca into a hug. "I can't believe it's you!"

"I can't believe it's you!" Beca said, pulling back from the hug. "How do you know Aubrey?"

"We met in a yoga class, and we hit it off," Chloe said, wrapping her hand around Beca's arm. "We got to talking, and she invited me to the party and said there was someone I just had to meet. I had no idea that someone was you."

"What Chloe failed to mention is that she did nothing but talk about her best friend from when she was a kid," Aubrey said, joining them. "When she said your name, I just knew we had to bring you two together. I told Stacie, and we concocted a plan to have you reunite here at the party."

"This is amazing," Beca said. "How long has it been?"

"Gosh, like twelve years," Chloe said.

"You look amazing," Beca said. "Although, I always thought you looked amazing. I know you're not going to believe this, but I had a huge crush on you back then."

"I had a huge crush on you, too," Chloe said. "By the time I realized I liked you, you had moved. I always wondered what happened to you."

"My parents divorced, and my mom and I moved to Seattle to live with my grandmother," Beca said. "I never forgot you and think about you all the time."

"Do you want to maybe exchange numbers?" Chloe asked. "I'd love to get together in a quieter setting and catch up."

"I'd like that," Beca said, retrieving her phone from her purse. "Here, put your number in, and I'll call you."

Chloe set down her drink and took Beca's phone. After adding herself to Beca's contacts list, she handed the phone back.

"I'm gonna get a fresh drink," Chloe said. "Would you like something?"

"I'll go with you if that's okay," Beca said.

Chloe took Beca's hand and headed to the kitchen.

"They are so going to get married," Stacie said as she and Aubrey smiled and clinked their glasses together.

~~ 25 Days of BeChloe Christmases 2022 ~~

A year later, Chloe and Beca were getting ready for Stacie and Aubrey's Christmas Eve party.

"I love that dress on you," Beca said, wrapping her arms around Chloe from behind.

"You say that about everything I wear," Chloe said.

"Well, then it must be true," Beca said, kissing Chloe's shoulder before pulling away. "Do you think Aubrey would kill us if we decided to stay home?"

"Oh, she definitely would," Chloe said, laughing as she put on her earrings. "Especially when Stacie proposes, and we're not there to see it."

"I almost forgot about that," Beca said. "Do you think that will be us getting engaged in a few years?"

"I hope it's sooner than that," Chloe said, chuckling.

Chloe gasped when she turned and found Beca down on one knee.

"Is now soon enough?" Beca asked, holding up a ring box.

"Oh, my gosh," Chloe said as she stared at Beca.

"Well?" Beca said, raising the ring higher. "What do you say?"

"You haven't asked me yet," Chloe said, grinning.

"Chloe Beale, will you marry me?"

"Um, can I think about it and get back to you?" Chloe said, smirking.

"The offer expires in exactly ten seconds," Beca said, standing to face Chloe. "10. 9. 8. 7. 6-"

"Yes! Yes, I'll marry you," Chloe said, laughing as she leaned in to kiss Beca.

Beca wrapped her arms around Chloe's waist as Chloe put her arms around Beca's shoulders.

"I love you," Beca said as the kiss ended.

"I love you, too," Chloe said. "Oh, Brey is going to be so pissed when she finds out we got engaged before she did."

"You've seen the ring Stacie got her," Beca said. "She'll get over it."

"Merry Christmas to us," Chloe said, laughing as she pulled Beca into another kiss.

A/N: My apologies that it's so short, but posting a fic a day doesn't leave much time to flesh out some stories. I do hope you like what I did with it.

[imaginefan]

Can you do a part 5 to I'll try where Klaus sends him to Mystic Falls for him to be safe and the reader is at the bar drinking his sorrows and he sees Caroline and Elena come in and Elena walks to him and ask " How could you save Katherine after all she's done?" He looks at her and says " Easily she made me into a vampire gave my life a purpose and also made me meet my family and she is a survivor she doesn't wait around for people to save them me and her are the same and I will not go after Katherine again Elena I don't care who an line with and don't go crying To Klaus he is on my side and let's say I have an upgrade." The girls walk out in walks Damon Y/N raises his glass and Damon walks to him and says Y/N Conrad Y/L/N I am sorry I wasn't a part of your life human and vampire life your mom came to me in a dream telling me to look after you and I know you hate me but I have been trying to protect you as is Stefan their is a secret that only Stefan and I know I did find you and your mother when you were born before your mother's parents through you guys out in 1862 I snuck into the house via window and I saw your mom holding you in her arms and she looked at me and asked " What are you doing here Damon Conrad Salvatore?" I look at her and say " Needed to make sure your okay." She looked at me and says " Just peachy gave birth to an Bastard boy and my ma and Pa only give me three weeks here and you visit and you told me you can't be with me so don't go anywhere near our precious baby boy you didn't fight for when I was pregnant with you protect him now from your father and anyone else." I nod and Sneak back out and I head back home and I see Father cornering Stefan for where abouts father turns around and sees me and says " You went to see Y/M/N I know she gave birth last night to 8 pound baby boy." I nod but look down and he doesn't hit me or threaten her or the baby so I just walk up to my room and I scream.

I finish the story and Y/N just looks at me and says Sarcasticly " You just want to protect your precious Elena and to do that you need me well news flash Pa I am loyal to the Mikaelson and Katherine sometimes and Klaus let her go after puppy eyes I got them after I pulled them on Rebekah and Hayley. They like me without Obligation. Lets ask you this if I wanted you and Stefan to drop everything and cone with me to New Orleans would you probably not." As I finsh I feel a dark pressence and Damon pulls me into his side and says " Hello mother and Jullian nice surprise." I look at him in WTH did you say the woman speaks " Damon dear who is this young lad with you." I leave his side and say " Watch it lady I have some powers and fangs and I am with the Mikaelsons so if any thing happens to me you rain hell on yourself the name is." Before I can finish Damon puts his hand over my mouth and won't let it go so I lick his hand and he let's me go and I speed out and go to the cemetery and I sit by moms upgraded gravestone must be Damon's or Klaus doing but suddenly the world went dark.

Jullian kidnaps Y/N

So Klaus and Srefan and Damon and Lily Salvatore team up just in time for Lily to find out she has a grandson

Hope that you like it!

Here

[wearyrains]

A very unpolished preview of the one shot to come...

“Remember when I said I support you in all your decisions? I’m excluding this one, this is a terrible idea.” 

Elizabeth looks up at her husband a little taken aback by his semi-rant. She has made a lot of decisions in the course of her career and she always instinctively knew when he would disagree. But this? This was simple. And none of her decisions are ever simple.

"What about it bothers you?"

"You want to corkscrew your way into a war zone and you're asking why it bothers me?" He looks at her incredulously. Does she not remember when she almost died two years ago? Or has that been erased from her memory due to a blow to the head?

"Seriously, Elizabeth. I get that I put my life at risk to. I really get it. And do you realize how often you fight with me about that? But when you make a decision there is never even room for discussion. You're gonna do it. You do realize that it is just as hard for me to wait on the ground for you as it is for you to wait for me?"

Elizabeth listens as his voice steadily raises throughout his rant.

"You almost died in Iran! And then it took you months to be okay. For months I held you while you had nightmares that you never spoke about, and yet here you are ready to go and do it all over again. Don't you realize that it's not just about you? Do you realize what it would do to me if you didn't come back? What it'll do to the kids?"

She swallows, "We've um... We never talked about how you felt after..." She says quietly. She is just making this realization. She had sat on a therapists couch for six months and talked about it. She had identified and worked through triggers. She had developed coping skills. And Henry had been there. He had stoically stood by her side and helped her through. She had never stopped to think about how he had coped. She had been so wrapped up in her own recovery, she had forgotten that he was going through nearly losing her.

"I yelled at Conrad," he admits. He doesn't know why he starts there, it feels like weird shift. Maybe it's because he still blames Conrad for most of the pain Elizabeth has been through. And in some way, he blames her too.

"You did?" She encourages. She wants to hear him. She wants to bear witness to what he went through. She wants him to know that she does care about his feelings and she is not ignoring them.

"When Nadine called to tell me that communications from your security team were not coming through. And they had found Givani dead, with no sign of you or his family. Elizabeth I can't even explain to you where my head went... I was so scared and I saw red. I wanted to kill him." He shakes his head at the memory. He had been a loose canon, not sure what he would do if she hadn't made it home.

"I don't really remember driving to the White House. Or even what I said. But I do remember thinking... That if they didn't find you dead... That you were alive... I remember thinking what was happening to you... We had all thought at the time that you had been taken. It was like I had completely forgotten that you used to be in the CIA and knew how to conduct yourself in a warzone. So many thoughts went through my head. I was so scared," He admits.

He takes a deep breath and she waits.

"Henry you know I wasn't lying. Nothing like that happened. I went from Givani's house to the bunker with his security team." She feels the need to reassure him.

"I know that now, but I didn't then. You were gone. For fifteen hours no one knew where you were. No one knew if you were safe. I kept picturing our kids watching your execution on YouTube," he admits.

"Henry... I am so sorry," she whispers. She still hasn't fully gotten over the guilt she feels over the entire thing and this has added another level. Which she is sure was not Henry's intention, and most likely was the reason he has kept these feelings to himself.

"It's not your fault. I didn't mean to make it seem like that." He runs a hand down his face.

"I didn't even realize how much it affected you until just now. And I should've."

Henry swallows, "You were going through a lot. And then I was going through a lot. And then we were going through a lot..." He trails off.

"That... Is one way to describe the last two and half years, a lot." There is small sad smile on her face., 'I should've been more present for you. I should've pushed more, made sure you were seeing someone. Iran and the Dmitri hit too soon after. It was too much, I'm sorry."

"Elizabeth. Please stop apologizing. There's nothing to apologize for. I'm fine."

"Clearly," she retorts. She doesn't know where her sudden flash of anger comes from, but it's red hot, "I don't why you keep all of these things from me and then explode once every six months or so. It is so unfair!"

"Elizabeth, calm down. You're blowing this out of proportion."

"No, you are not okay! And you aren't even trying to fix it. And instead of letting me help you, you push me away. You're right when you say the last few years have been a lot. They have been. But have you actually taken any time at all to process any of your trauma? And I don't mean the five sessions of marriage therapy. That was about our communication breakdown not your trauma. Because you refuse to see a therapist and you won't talk to me. So, you hold it all in, and then when it's too much you blow up. And you're not okay, so stop saying you are."

Henry swallows. He remembers how long it took him to open up to her after desert storm. He had vowed to never go silent on her again. He had made a promise to himself that he would let her be his sanctuary the same way he is hers. He had kept that promise. It was easy to keep in Charlottesville. But now, life has gotten complicated again. And he has lost sight of that. He doesn't know what he should say, how much he should let himself open up. He is used to being her rock, not the other way around.

Prompt #874

“Remember when I said I support you in all your decisions? I’m excluding this one, this is a terrible idea.” 

[cer-rata]

Fic WIP(maybe): "World's Okayest"

"So," Conrad started, eyes bright and excited, "I think the three of us are like, a thing."

Jon slowly turned away from the diner’s window to look at him, mostly in horror and confusion. Mostly. "...W-what? You...you're not suggesting...what?"

"Like, you know, Batman and Superman and Wonder Woman. The big three."

Jon let out a sigh of relief. "Oh. oh okay, I thought you were trying to say--"

Damian snorted. "Yeah, considering what Conrad writes in his spare time, maybe you shouldn't relax so quickly."

"DAMIAN!"

Jon blinked. "...Conrad--"

"Don't listen to him! He's evil and he lies and--"

"He's quite prolific." Damian laughed as Conrad missed him with a thrown French fry.

Jon shook his head. "I don't even want to know. Um. Conrad, where were you going with--"

"Oh! Right! Before SATAN took the wheel--I dunno, I just think we work together pretty well, maybe we should do it more consistently.”

“I’d like that.” Jon really did enjoy spending time with them, even when they were getting shot at.

Damian shrugged. “I mean, I don’t think we need to imitate those old bags and Diana, but sure.”

“But I don’t think it’s imitating, it’s pretty natural. Jon is ‘Angry Superman--’”

“Hey!”

“You’re ‘GNC Wonder Woman--’”

“Wh-wait--”

“And I’m ‘The Batman Who Fucks.’”

Damian stared at him. “...Are you insane?”

“Yes, that is exactly why I’m Batman.”

Jon snorted and covered his mouth.

“Conrad, there is no way--” Damian leaned in angrily, “How the hell am I not Batman?”

“Batman is scary. I’m scary. You’re not scary.”

“I beg your pardon?!”

“If both of us are dangling someone off of a roof, which one of us might actually drop them?”

Jon looked mildly alarmed. “...Neither of you? Right?”

Damian groaned. “...Okay, but that’s not a good--Batman doesn’t kill people!”

“I never said I’d allow them the release of death. But see, right now: You’re even-tempered, relatively normal, patient even though I am going out of my way to irritate you--that’s Diana, bro.”

“Are you saying I’m Diana because you think I’m boring?!”

“No, Diana’s not boring, you being boring has nothing to do with it.”

Damian sighed and leaned back in his seat. “Oh, Conrad. Conrad, Conrad, Conrad…”

Jon looked back and forth between them a couple of times. “Wait, are you guys actually arguing or--”

Conrad turned to make eye contact with him and smiled. “The trick is to get him ready to kill you. He won’t, so he has to resort to something else and--hey, no, D, your side of the booth is over there, across from me where I’m safe--”

Ah no, it was flirting then. Again.

Damian slid into the booth next to him, and Conrad scooted over into Jon, who didn’t budge at all and just watched with amusement and maybe something a little more…sour.

Conrad laughed and curled up against him. “Damian, I’m sorry!” 

Damian slid closer, appearing perfectly relaxed and normal when compared to Conrad’s giggly hysterics. “What’s wrong, beloved? I’m not doing anything.”

“Oh no! You only call me that when you’re worried or I’m in trouble!”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Conrad squeaked and pressed his cheek into Jon’s shoulder. “Sammy, help!”

Conrad was the only person Jon would let call him by his middle name. He even liked it, actually. He tried not to ponder that, but failed, and his smile started to wilt. His guts felt tight. “Eh, I think…I think you’re fine…”

Conrad sat straight up so quickly that he and Damian knocked foreheads. “Fuck, my bad--”

“Ow! Why!?”

“Sorry, I just…” He turned to look at Jon. “What…what happened?”

Jon stared at him. “...What?”

“You just uh…you got a little…uh…” Conrad suddenly looked trapped and Jon couldn’t figure out what on Earth that was about.

Damian leaned over to look at him too and raised an eyebrow. “That’s...just a Midwestern thing, Conrad, they always look a little lost.”

“I’m not from the--” Jon made eye contact with Conrad again, and caught the violet flash of his irises. Then Conrad nodded gently and turned back to Damian.

“Ah, I guess you’re right. You can go back to mauling me if you want.”

Damian shook his head. “No, you killed my momentum, I’ve added it to my bank of cruelty and spite to be spent later at my leisure.” 

The lunch went on from there, their rambunctiousness settling some. Still, that look Conrad gave him, combined with the glow of his eyes unsettled Jon a bit. Did he get a vibe from him? What would he even have felt that would alert Conrad? Sure, he was a little queasy for a moment but…

“...Okay but the problem is, I wasn’t planning to make my next moniker a front-facing one.” Damian explained. “The ‘Trinity' thing is mostly for the public to have something to cling to, and well, frankly to make my father seem less…like a terrorist.”

“But I’ve seen the costume you’re thinking of, babe, if you’re trying to be hidden, why the red and white and the big yellow ‘I’ on your chest? And it glows?”

“Symbols are important--” 

“But it all suggests that you want people to be aware of you.”

Damian sighed. “It’s a complicated…thing.” He paused. “I don’t want to scare civilians, but I also don’t really want to be paraded around as some symbol of morality. I don’t think I can be that.”

Conrad shrugged. “I mean I’m on lunch boxes now, and I’m…maybe a little less…restrained than you are.”

“Which you’re working on.”

“It’d be easier if you’d start restraining me inst--”

“Jon is sitting right there!’

“Fuck, right, sorry buddy.”

Jon waved them off and took a long drink of his soda and desperately wished it was socially acceptable to anxiety crunch on glass in public. 

Conrad’s gaze lingered on him again before he continued. “...I’m working on it, yeah. But like…my point is that no one has a problem with me, why should you need to be sneaky?”

“Because…because I’m good at it, I was trained to be precise and quiet and--”

“You really should lean more in Dick’s direction.” Jon said. “He’s still intimidating and civilians love him.”

Damian looked away and Jon heard him swallow. “I…I’m not inspiring like that.”

Conrad growled and angrily called Damian a word only he could say, which caused Jon to gasp and Damian to flinch. “--please, if I weren’t so inspired by you, I’d have probably turned into hotter, more effective, cooler, funnier, more stylish, significantly scarier Red Hood.”

“Well…well…we can’t rely on the general public being bewitched by me.”

“Cause you’re too much of a little bitch for a crop top--ah! No! Stahahahahp! Damian!”

Jon closed his eyes and sighed while the ‘Lovebirds’ went at it again. He found himself wishing that Jack or even Lor was there, and then with horror realized that not going for Darla instead probably implied something. He could only be so avoidant, he wasn’t Damian. Ugh. It wasn’t even that he couldn’t see her that way, on occasion he did--but it wasn’t the same energy, which was probably good, because having some form of distracting emotional entanglement with everyone he worked with sounded like a horrible time. Still, watching Conrad giggle while Damian’s hands roamed around with a playfulness that Jon had apparently never earned from his best friend made him feel some sort of way. He acknowledged that was maybe…a little gay. 

Maybe he was a little gay. 

Jon groaned loudly enough that the couple stopped what they were doing and looked over at him.

“...Jonathan, is something actually wrong?”

“No!”

Conrad managed to steady his breathing. “C’mon dude, we’re your friends, I can’t have two emotionally constipated--”

“I think I like boys!”

Damian looked completely blindsided, and maybe a little afraid. Conrad looked kind of…guilty?

“Oh. Um.” Damian’s eyes flicked around rapidly like he was desperately searching his brain for something. “Uh…exclusively?”

Jon dropped his face into his hands, muffling his words into his palms. “I dunno! I don’t think so! I think Darla is really pretty, and Devyn, and Kathy--”

“Still?” Conrad didn’t manage to keep the disappointment out of his voice.

“Shut up!

Damian raised an eyebrow. “Who is Devyn?”

“Oh, she’s just a girl at my school. So like, I think girls are pretty, and I think if any of them asked me out, I’d probably say yes, but also--”

“You’re somewhat attracted to all of your friends, and the the intensity varies.” Conrad finished quietly, sounding ashamed like he was revealing that he’d eaten the last cookie after all.

Jon bit his cheek and looked away. “...Something like that.” 

Damian sat with that for a moment. “...So you’re actually ‘Disastrous Bi-Panic Superman.’”

That was dumb enough to snap Jon out of the beginnings of a spiral, and he laughed. “I hate you.”

Damian smiled. “So Kathy is the last one of us to only do things as God intended.” 

Jon pursed his lips. “Uhhh…no, I think she’s ace, actually.”

Conrad shook his head. “No, no, Kathy just doesn’t like humans.”

Jon blinked. “Wait, really?”

Conrad nodded. “Yeah, she said she’s ‘not a monster fucker.’”

Damian nodded sagely. “Wise.”

Jon squinted. “I don’t…Kathy looks just like us--well okay she’s really green, but otherwise--”

“I don’t think you mom’s a monsterfucker, if that’s what you’re getting at.” Conrad offered. Jon was impressed that it sounded like he genuinely thought that sentence would be comforting. 

“Okay! Okay violently moving on--”

“Oh. OH!” Damian sat up a little straighter. “That’s why you always wear skinny jeans, despite them being a number of years out of fashion! It’s an expression of your flammable nature.”

Jon blushed. “Wh--flammable--”

“Babe, skinny jeans are coming back.”

“You lie.”

“It’s kind of a ten year cycle for popular items.”

“But skinny jeans? Really?”

“You’d look great in skinny jeans.”

“I look great in everything. I could wear Vandal Savage like a coat and make it...what, make it fashion? That doesn’t mean he’s valid.”

They both startled at the loud crunch Jon made when he bit directly into his glass.